*NOW VOYAGER* The Official Newsletter of the Kate Mulgrew Appreciation Society * Volume III Number 4 *ALL ABOUT NOW VOYAGER* Greetings from the Kate Mulgrew Appreciation Society. KMAS Inc., a Maryland non-profit corporation, is Kate Mulgrew's official fan club. You can reach us at P.O. Box 34745, Bethesda, MD 20827-4745, or online at tigger@cais.cais.com. Current yearly dues are $25 U.S., $32/Canada-Mexico, $40/Overseas (U.S. bank funds only). Send Self-Addressed Stamped Envelope for information, or $5 for a sample issue of Now Voyager, or e-mail for the electronic edition of this bimonthly newsletter. If you would like a copy of our submission guidelines or our bylaws, send a S.A.S.E. Now Voyager is on the World Wide Web at http://www.engr.umbc.edu/~mpanti1/mulgrew/. For print back issue requests, send a S.A.S.E. to Anne Davenport, 6211 E. Azalea Ave. B, Panama City Beach, FL 32408. This is a not-for-profit, amateur publication and is not intended to infringe upon the copyrights of any media corporation. All material is copyrighted by the authors except for the trademarks and patents of Viacom, Inc. No part of this newsletter may be reproduced or forwarded without permission, in print or electronically. The opinions expressed herein are not necessarily those of the editors, KMAS Inc., Kate Mulgrew, or Paramount Pictures. KMAS INC. BOARD OF DIRECTORS Michelle Erica Green, president. Joan Testin, vice president. Lauren Baum, treasurer. Anne Davenport, membership secretary. Mary Taylor, business secretary. Paul Anderson, assistant secretary. Barbe Smith, charity coordinator. Peter Castillo, legal advisor. Jeanne Donnelly, corporate advisor. NOW VOYAGER STAFF Jennifer Pelland, internet mailing list coordinator. Michael Pantiuk & Cheryl Zenor, web page designers. Donna Christenberry, assistant editor. Anna Shuford, membership directory designer. Beth Schuman & Nancy Molik, convention coordinators. *EDITORIAL BUZZ* I think I've done enough ranting about all the things Voyager's producers have done to piss me off this season, so I'll give it a break. I'm in the mood for having fun. I think I'll go jetskiing. It's not what it sounds like...well, actually it IS what it sounds like, which is where the name comes from. But it has nothing to do with aquatic acrobatics. "JetSki" is an affectionate name for one of the internet Janeway/Chakotay lists, started in Canada, where J&C becomes JetC, "et" being the French term for "and." Hence, JetSki. (You should see the adorable water-skiing graphics on the web page.) This is not another column about Janeway and Chakotay's relationship, honest. This is about their fans. I'm a J/Cer by almost any standards--well, other than those of people who insist on seeing onscreen sex--but I've been a JetSkier only sporadically. I was on the first JetC list, but dropped out when the mail volume got too high. I've lurked on the group stories. Now I understand that there are four independent JetC lists, plus a JetC Jr. list for under-18s. There's a main web page and several linked pages from the various lists. In addition to JetC, there are numerous other online sites where J/C fans congregate. The Fold, which is the name the America Online Janeway/Chakotay discussion board adopted a few thousand messages or so, is one of the largest. Then there's the venerable alt.startrek.creative newsgroup--which is home to funny posts and lively debate, in addition to the stories which the stalwarts insist should be the sole raison d'etre for the newsgroup. One can find discussion, episode reviews, debate, fan fiction including some superlatively hysterical group efforts, and rewriting of musicals with J/C themes--filk singing, to use the vernacular. I understand that the JetC lists also tend to interpret popular song lyrics in a J/C context. Sound goofy? OK, somewhat. But I've never seen such an explosion of fan creativity. Probably this is what it was like in the early days after Classic Trek was cancelled, when the first TOS zines started up, but that didn't involve as many people--before the Internet, fandom was a smaller, less accessible world. It's sort of like when the Klingon Language Institute formed and finished inventing the language Mark Okrand started, to the point that they've translated Hamlet (I hope someone gave Robert Beltran a copy), but that was more scholarly, more formal. Jetskiing is a free-for-all. It shares some of the best qualities of early Trek fandom--it's collaborative, it's creative, it refuses to accept passively the ideas and ideals offered by a television show--increasingly, it's also better written and more consistently characterized than most Voyager episodes. Sure, there's some romance novel-type fluff, and a lot of stories with no science fiction to speak of, but there are also several entire novels and alternate timelines in which groups of writers have created together a variant on the Trek universe...usually really interesting ones, places where Maquis/Starfleet tensions are really explored, where real loneliness and profound friendships are explored, where things aren't resolved back to square one at the end of a specific block of time. It's a terrific place for writers to play--a set of characters and background we already have in common, without the strictures of network TV. Interestingly, a large group of JetCers are actually opposed to onscreen romance between Janeway and Chakotay. They don't buy the argument that J/C would make Voyager a soap opera, but they do think that canonical consummation would ruin the fan fiction. Moreover, as one JetC1 list member says, "Many of us doubt that TPTB can write it correctly...there is a great desire for a mature, adult relationship. If Torres/Paris so far is supposed to be that, god help J/C." It's almost more fun not to get onscreen resolutions; for all the wonderful things the episode of that name gave us, it also represented a breaking point for a lot of fanfic. J/C stories are usually labeled pre- or post-"Resolutions" (and increasingly post-"Unity," or set in a universe where "Unity" never happened). I think most of us want to see warmth and humor between Janeway and Chakotay, and we hate the idea of either of them with an alien of the week. But maybe Paramount should leave real relationship development to the jetskiiers. They do it better. *KATEWATCH* CREATION'S GRAND SLAM 21 MARCH 1997, PASADENA, CALIFORNIA I've always been a fan of strong female characters on television. When I was a kid, I wanted to be just like Honey West, April Dancer from Girl From U.N.C.L.E., Mrs. Peel on The Avengers or even Samantha Stevens on Bewitched. Why keep house like Donna Reed when I could become an international spy and karate-chop my way toward world peace! Okay, when I grew up, I got a lesson in reality. I learned I couldn't pull the cap off of my ballpoint pen like April Dancer and communicate my views to world leaders because they really didn't want to listen. And I learned I couldn't twitch my nose like Samantha Stevens to get the same pay as a man who did the same job I did. These TV women taught me to go after an adventure even if itdid seem impossible. I decided to become one of the few women (at the time!) who chose to study journalism and pursue a career in the newspaper business. I continued to be intrigued by strong female characters. Those days, I emulated Mary Richards in the newsroom. Hey, she was a little corny, but she had that determination no matter what to make it on her own. And it was about this time that I met Mrs. Columbo and found out that I, too, loved a mystery. My teachers warned me that finding a job on a newspaper wouldn't be easy. I don't know if I would have mustered up enough nerve to defy the odds if I didn't have the inspiration and strength from my comrades, my TV heroines. I figured I'd probably pump gas or work in fast food for awhile, but someday I knew I was gonna make it if I tried. I did reach my dream, and for the last 20 years, I have been a newspaper reporter and later, a magazine editor. And how thrilled I am on a daily basis to see stronger female characters on television for generations to come, and more women in the entire spectrum of the work force today. I never really took the time to watch Star Trek over the years, and didn't become a fan until I read that the Federation was about to initiate a female captain aboard the U.S.S. Voyager, and that captain was going to be my old friend, Mrs. Columbo. Captain Janeway intrigued me from the start. Another strong female character, smart and filled with compassion for her crew and a fiery passion for her career. A character after my own heart. I followed Captain Janeway through the seasons and grew to respect her more and more. And whenever I read anything about Kate Mulgrew, it seemed that she was a lot like her character. I had the pleasure of seeing Kate in person for the first time at Grand Slam in Pasadena, CA, in March. I've always found Kate to be so articulate and well-versed whenever I read about her or see her on interview shows and my opinion hasn't changed. She's a joy to listen to and her enthusiasm for her job, for being the first female captain on Trek, and for her fans is infectious. Kate came out on stage in a sleek, almost raspberry-colored dress and moved confidently back and forth on stage to chat with fans in all corners of the auditorium. She spoke about the Voyager season finale involving the Borg, and said it would shock us. "It's pretty scary," Kate said. "I don't know how they are going to resolve it." As we expected, Kate also addressed the burning question about the progression of Janeway and Chakotay's relationship. Or, as Kate eloquently put it, "dropping of the knickers." "Where does she go with all those emotions?" Kate asked. This was the perfect segue into revealing that Janeway will have a new holonovel that will bring her face to face with a man she has admired throughout her life--Leonardo da Vinci. Kate was thrilled about this development for Janeway, saying that they tried to think of whom Janeway would go to when she needed someone to talk to or someone to advise her, "who could bring her creative dynamic out in the open." Kate was thrilled about the introduction of da Vinci as a mentor for Janeway especially because he shares similar passions. "He marries art to science," she explained. I had to laugh when a fan asked if Michael Nouri would play Leonardo da Vinci! Kate and Michael are apparently old friends, and met when she recently hosted the Regis and Kathie Lee Show. Kate noted how tall Michael was and seemed to be quite taken by him. Soon, they were playfully flirting and Regis was playing right along. Later, both Kate and Michael appeared on Rosie O'Donnell and the joking continued! Kate responded by saying they were good friends. "I've known him for years and years and he's dangerous." Kate proceeded to talk about all of the cast members of Voyager. When she mentioned Chakotay, the audience "wooed." And she answered, "Oh, ladies, ladies. It's hard to tear my eyes away from him." She did say that Janeway will put the need to consummate this relationship aside. "That doesn't mean she will lose the companionshipof this wonderful man." In fact, Kate noted that Janeway and Chakotay would become the best and most complex friends and that there would be some future "friction" between them. Kate mentioned there will also be "something interesting" developing between B'Elanna and Paris and she admired both actors Roxann Biggs and Robbie McNeill. On Ethan Phillips (Neelix), she said he is "goodness personified" and the "song of the ship." On Jennifer Lien (Kes), she said that Jennifer is an avid reader and always has her nose in a book on the set. On Garrett Wang (Kim), she said he's lots of fun. And of course, she had plenty of stories about the antics of Tim Russ (Tuvok). He is well known for being the clown on the set. "He's a dead man," she joked as she told a story about how she had one more close-up to do before going home and Tim kept taunting her with spitballs! "Those boys--after 1 a.m., I don't know what happens to them!" Later, Kate was very gracious and warm to the fans, especially the young ones, as they asked her questions. One 13-year-old girl told Kate she was her "most favorite person in the whole world" and Kate was flabbergasted. "No, I couldn't be--I am??" The girl told Kate she wanted to be an archaeologist. Later, Kate said to her, "I want you to promise me something. I don't want you to promise me that you'll be an archaeologist, but promise me you'll be passionate about whatever you study." As the president of the Official Martha Hackett Fan Club, I am often asked why I started a fan club for a character like Seska. My answer is: I admire her determination. I admire her guts to go after what she wants no matter what. And I've always wanted a pair of "brass you-know-whats" just like her! The influence of strong female TV characters--and actresses--lives on. --Donna Abate After the usual "I Want To Go Home" video, Creation introduced Kate at 4:40 p.m. on the first night of Grand Slam. She came bounding out on stage, waving, wearing a fuchsia sleeveless short dress with low cut back. She had her hair short, which I think looks great. As always, she started out by saying what an honor and a privilege it was to be there and to be a part of Star Trek. Then she went on to explain that she was a bit woozy from some shots she had gotten the day before in preparation for going on vacation, including shots for typhoid, cholera and malaria. She referred to having had about 18 different shots. But one son is a "shot-a-phobic" and refused to get the shots. She told him, "we are going to head off into the jungle of Central America, go into the jungle, live with the tribes. We are going to be so excited with this entirely new world being revealed to us. And I'm going to have one sick puppy on my hands and we're going to have to come back." She talked about the cliffhanger, and made the comment that she didn't know how the writers were going to get them out of it. There is a scene shot against a blue background where she had to pretend that she was surrounded, and could only move a few inches in any direction. She made believe that she was in a room with a serial killer, and managed to scare herself. Needless to say, the audience got a good laugh out of that one. She talked about the introduction of a new character, a holograph created by Janeway of Leonardo da Vinci. She talked about how Janeway can be warm and available to the crew but she can't go to them to talk about her feelings. Therefore da Vinci, who combines art and science, becomes the person to whom she goes to talk. Kate said Janeway feels the isolation and loneliness; she is not made of steel. Then she started on J/C. The crowd was very interested in this and applauded loudly. Kate said, "Ladies, calm down." She said there is definitely a chemistry there. "But you can't deal with it in the old-fashioned way. There should be no dropping of the knickers. It's not like Janeway. Anyway there is no way she could drop her knickers in that outfit." But, she "doesn't have to sacrifice a relationship with this adorable man. They are going to become the best and most complex of friends. That way you will not lose the tension and you will see the relationship fly." They are building around that fact that he is a Maquis warrior and she is Starfleet. She talked about Tim and his preference for practical jokes and loving the freedom from wearing his clothes. How much she loves working with Picardo and the wonderful work he did this year. What a charming and wonderful person Ethan is. How much she enjoys Roxann. She called Garrett and Jennifer "the kids." She said Jennifer always has her nose in a book. A 13-year-old girl said that Kate was her role model and that she had seen just about everything Kate has done. The girl wants to be an archaeologist. Kate made her promise that whatever she did, she should be passionate about it. One lady said she heard Kate loved to sing. Kate's reply was "Really." Kate says she sings to herself, but that's it. The next person who came to the mike said it was her birthday, that she was 22 and had never had a good birthday. Kate asked her to come on stage, then gave her a kiss and a hug. Then she got everyone to sing "Happy Birthday" to the girl. For someone who can't sing, she did a great job. It was typical of this gracious lady to end her segment with warmth and class. --Alana Voeller Kate was introduced to the tune of "Sloop John B," which she obviously enjoyed, and had become familiar with at conventions. Her opening remark was in homage to that tune, saying it "almost makes me cry." Always gracious, she began with thanking the audience for attending. Her remarks continued, touching on how unconditional the support group was, "vast -- and it feels unconditional -- although, I know you are, in fact, a highly critical group," which brought down the house with laughter. She glided across the stage, asking "forgiveness for being woozy" after shot after shot (18) in preparation for a trip with "three pubescent boys into the jungles of Central America, leaving at the crack of dawn on the morrow." Woozy or not, she held the audience through her tale of one "shot-phobic" child who refused shots and "was bound to be sick" and shorten the trip. She referred to her stint on Regis and Kathie Lee where she talked of that trip, which she had called Outward Bound. It was not, of course. She was referring to it in the generic sense; however, she corrected the error, admitting it was a "kind of elegant Outward Bound -- I have a jeep, a driver, two guides, and a cook." She feels the third season was remarkable in that it was a "search to winnow out any weaknesses and find the true trajectory of the series." She predicted the cliffhanger ending would be "shocking, unpredictable, mesmerizing, and so terrifying." She admitted to being so terrified playing in the Borg hive -- she "gave herself goose bumps." It was all done with blue screen, so everything had to take place in her imagination. "They" had explained she was in the Borg hive, and she only had a "few inches" she could move in each direction (4"x2"x 1.5"). She was risking assimilation of self, crew and species. She began playing the scene "too aggressive and straightforward," until she imagined herself "in a closed room, in a contained space -- with a serial murderer!" There was a moment's hesitation, as she decided she could tell us something she was "pretty sure was out." A new character will be introduced and continue on the series. He came from the collective imagination of writers, producers and her own perceptions of "Janeway's need to express herself, address her feelings of loneliness, confusion and inaccessibility. She can be warm to her crew, but can't avail herself of them on an intimate level -- anymore than Rick Berman can do with me." That remark resulted in lots of laughs! Mulgrew is concerned the audience will see "Janeway as perfect. We have to make her a feeling person. The holodeck provides the means" – but the gothic character certainly hadn't worked. "She's so busy being the captain for the crew, and a scientist, all day - how can she sublimate those needs? She takes them tothe greatest master of all times; the one who married art and science: Leonardo da Vinci." They'll begin a friendship in the holodeck. She admitted there was a "natural chemistry" between Janeway and Chakotay. "It has a life. It can't be beat." But Kate wants to "do it right. No dropping of the knickers." Besides, Mulgrew's not dropping HER knickers for the cameras. Laughs again! Kate's obvious feeling is: "Janeway is the captain, in charge of a full crew. She's still a woman of child-bearing age, with all its attendant concerns and problems. Even in the 24th century, "what's good for the goose is not good for the gander." Janeway's still a "lady who would sacrifice the gratification of that very important need. But, Kathryn Janeway doesn't have to lose the relationship. She doesn't have to lose her heart and soul, and she certainly doesn't have to lose the companionship." So, if she can't do "all the things that have been done before -- jump into bed, get drunk, make out, or have stupid quarrels," the challenge is to let the characters become "the best and most complex of friends." That nearly brought the house down. Additionally, before the end of the season, Mulgrew promised the audience will be surprised. She suggest no one forget "after all, Chakotay IS a Maquis warrior, and I AM a Starfleet Captain." Friction, at last? That's a thing often asked for by Mulgrew at prior conventions. She's promising more of what was seen between J and C in "Caretaker." And more: "Something interesting happening between Paris and B'Elanna." Loads of applause followed that announcement. She spent more time on this "perfect couple" who are "so different and yet the same. He has the humor, she has the tension." She promised more character self-actualization and action. "Scenes shot from the hip, the heart and fast! Everyone will be acting and reacting viscerally. I will anyway!" No more of the cerebral, moaning about being away from home and worrying about what the Delta Quadrant will hold. They're out to explore it, and enjoy it over seasons four and five. Mulgrew then paid homage to others of her crewmates: Picardo is a consummate professional, and nitpicker. She poked a little fun at him "picking apart bitty pieces," then admitted he was the most gifted actor on the crew. Tim Russ is, as we all know, "the dead man," attributing it to "boys after midnight." She confessed to "adoring him, nonetheless." Ethan Phillips is "goodness personified." She admitted he also gets a "little crazy after the eighth hour," but he's the "soul of the ship." Mulgrew feels his character needs to be "stabilized"; he has to "become more than just a cook and guide." "I love the kids," she said, referring to Garrett and Jennifer, who are the least well-known to her, she admitted. Jennifer is "intellectual, enterprising and a bibliophile." Garrett is "fun and funny and good." Then she went on to say the crew was the best in the history of Hollywood. She feels "this" is the best job and the "Best Kathy." She admitted missing her boys in the first season but feels she "could ask for very little more this season." This has been a "remarkable chapter in my life, and I'm so young!" More laughter followed that. Then came the questions. A few youngsters came up and she was gracious and caring of their feelings. Always diplomatic, she was kind in answering the more elementary questions of liking being on TV, the show, and being a captain. As for Shatner, regarding many early remarks of his: He should "start thinking before speaking." Regarding similarities between herself and Janeway, she brought down the house with her return question, asked deadpan: "Do I strike you as a rocket scientist?" But, she went on to say she had developed a "genuine interest in science." She's in a better groove on the show "now that I understand it better." She also spoke of her position as a role model. She was honored and took it "very seriously." She was proud to be the reason many had gone into scientific professions. She came to command "naturally -- being the oldest of eight." Differences between the camera and theater work are "Vast and significant." In the theater, they have a very definite practice time that leads to the performance date. Everything is learned in the order of the story, start to finish. In series work, scenes are shot out of sequence. There are "several (8-10) takes of the same scene from different camera angles, and much is done with blue screens where one is utterly alone with one's imagination." Additionally, the "camera does not lie." On stage, one can "say the lines," and resort to "grand gestures and voice." On camera, it is "so close, so austere, and so disciplined, one cannot lie and just mouth the words and gesture." A continuing challenge for her, and all of them on Voyager, is to "meet the camera with as much authenticity as I (we) possibly can... " Who's taller, Jennifer, Roxann or Kate? She laughed and said all of them "wear 4-inch" heels because the guys are so tall, all over 6 feet, and the women are all so small." Laughing again, she said she often thought of herself as a "giant of the double chromosome. I'm 5'5" and proud of it." Then she demonstrated how tiring and silly-looking it would be to always be looking up and stretching when she was talking to the male crew members. She said the heels had "wrecked her feet, and I used to be so vain about them. No longer." Someone said they'd heard she liked to sing. Her reply was a crusty "not so," but she bantered a bit, saying she'd "sung for my supper many a time," and that she had a "belter's voice -- you want to have a couple drinks (belts) before you sing." There was more than plenty of laughter and applause to that one. Then, a 22-year-old stated she had "never had a lucky birthday." Kate invited her on stage, saying she was going to get "a hand, a hug, a kiss, and WE'RE singing." She then led the audience in a rousing "Happy Birthday" song. So, the young woman had a happy --and lucky -- birthday. Kate Mulgrew's time on stage was over and no one was ready to see her go. The applause was long and loud, even as she thanked the audience and disappeared behind the curtain. --Jonni Pettit Kate appeared on Friday and said that early on Saturday, she and her two teen-aged sons were heading for the Central American jungle. They are taking a jeep, a guide, and two or three other guys for various and sundry, but they aren't going to Puerto Vallarta, so that sounds like roughing it to me. Kate is about my age, but can I see myself in the jungle? Not in a million years. Just the thought of those bugs and reptiles keep me safe at home. There are other things about Kate that remind me of Janeway. She really set the tone as a leader. After she told us about her pending trip, she talked about her fellow cast members, naming and praising each one, even "the dead man" Tim Russ. You've probably heard about the war of pranks they have going. I have hope that this crew will be able to keep this show going at least as long as TNG, because of the magic between the cast members. Then she spoke about the progress and future of Voyager. After three years, she said, they have had a chance to winnow out their strengths and weaknesses. Now they can really take off. Someone asked about the abrupt end to the romance of Kes and Neelix. She explained that it just hadn't worked out because of a lack of chemistry between the characters. She felt it was wrong to end it without an explanation or even a short scene for closure, but she suspected that the writers simply didn't know how to deal with it so they ignored it. On the other hand, the chemistry between Janeway and Chakotay was so real it couldn't be denied by the camera, so they decided they might as well use that chemistry. She said it was embarrassing how Janeway couldn't tear her eyes away from her first officer. She said she gets letters that almost say, "Dear Chakotay -- oh yeah, Janeway too." But don't expect any "dropping of knickers." Once that happens the romance and intensity is all gone. That will never happen. Besides, it just isn't Janeway. What they want to do is to develop a very complex friendship. Another thing that they have been working on for next season is a way for Janeway to release her tensions and creativity. Obviously, the gothic romance on the holodeck didn't work out. So they have come up with a recurring character with whom she can share her interests and explore her creativity, Leonardo da Vinci, a man who wedded science and art. (That should be interesting.) Kate was asked about Torres and Paris, and she thinks that that relationship could turn out to be an interesting one. Paris has the humor and Torres has the intensity and passion. Someone asked her about a contest of high heels that the ladies of Voyager were having. Kate said it wasn't a contest, but they did wear 4-inch heels. She said all the men on the bridge were at least 6 feet, and she is only 5'5". They didn't want her to look as though her head was tilted all the way back when she gave an order to one of those tall guys. She said it had ruined her feet, but it was a small price to pay for the job. And she said she was just right for the job because she was the oldest of eight kids, and just naturally bossy. She told us a little about the season-ending cliffhanger, which she has no idea how they will get out of. She said there is one scene on a Borg ship, and the director told her she was being too aggressive. She knew he was right so she tried to imagine that she was alone in a dark room with a serial killer. She scared herself so bad that the hair stood up on her neck and she got chilled. I can't wait to see this. --Peggy Carpenter On Friday, March 21, 1997 in Pasadena, CA, Creation Entertainment had its fifth annual Grand Slam convention. Of the several guest speakers, including Brent Spiner and Leonard Nimoy, Kate Mulgrew was the most enthusiastic, the most exciting and the most enjoyable. Obviously, she likes speaking with the fans. As the theme from Voyager was being performed live by Creation's Cosmic Orchestra, lights were flashing, smoke was billowing and Kate entered the stage in a stunning pink dress. Was that a thunderous roar from the fans? Admittedly, I took no notes of this marvelous event. And, as I have a lousy memory for details, let me recap some of the specifics that I do remember: Regarding J/C, Kate hopes that the writers will keep the captain and her first officer on a very friendly, but platonic, association. Kate wants to demonstrate that a man and a woman can have chemistry, yet remain good friends. Kate did allude to the fact that she thinks Robert Beltran is a handsome man. However, she warned the audience that the differences between Janeway & Chakotay will come to the surface, soon, and affect their relationship. Speaking of relationships, Kate mentioned that it is a joy for her to work with her costars. All of them are incredible actors and people. And, although she spends less personal time with Jennifer Lien and Garrett Wang, she believes that those two actors have a lot of growth potential. She is most proud of the way Robert Picardo has expanded his character's role. Kate mentions that everyone in the cast is prone to joke around, and then there is Tim Russ: Kate and Tim have a practical joke feud going on. It appears that after an entire day of getting spitballed from Tim, the hour of 2 a.m. arrived. Kate warned him to stop shooting the spitballs at her. She wanted to wrap up the scene and go home. Well, Tim didn't. She told him if he did it one more time, he would be "a dead man." And, as the cameras rolled, and Kate was about to speak, Tim shot her again. Kate then asked some wardrobe personnel to whom they had a greater allegiance: To her or Tim? The personnel claimed to worship her. "Good," she said. Then she instructed them to snatch all of Tim's clothes, his shoes, his keys, and his wallet while he was changing, and then bring the items to her. Well, this did happen, but Tim never came looking for them. Kate was in disbelief. How was Tim going to go anywhere? The next day, Tim acted as if nothing ever happened, which truly annoyed Kate. On topof that, Tim was not dressed for his scene. He went into the turbolift to change his clothes. After 15 minutes, Kate decided to find out why Tim had not come out of the turbolift. When she opened the doors, she found Tim totally naked trying to put his boots on. He said, "I believe this is the way you prefer me to dress." This really got Kate by the hair of her skin! Kate mentioned that this season's cliffhanger finale will be a "nail biter." She literally scared and terrified herself playing Janeway against the Borg. Finally, Kate was very supportive of fans and their questions. Especially, she encouraged young girls to be all that they want to be, do whatever they wanted, be as important as they wanted. She even sang "Happy Birthday" with the Cosmic Band to one fan who turned 22. --Dave Moravee "I've had babies with Janeway, a baby with Kes, a baby with Chakotay..." --Robbie McNeill at Novacon, Tysons Corner, VA *ONCE IN LOVE WITH JANEWAY* KATHERINE MULGREW, HIGH SCHOOL DRAMA STAR by Jennifer Martin Writer's note: When I called Kate Mulgrew's high school drama teacher and guidance counselor last month, I didn't know what to expect. The first was a priest, the second, a nun, and I had just converted to Catholicism. I had an absurd fear that they--like my catechists for the past 8 months--would grill me about religion ("A new Catholic, eh? So, can you recite the seven Sacraments?"). If they found me wanting, I was afraid they would tell Kate, and ask her what kind of flimsy Catholics she hangs around with, anyway. Instead, I found two very gracious people who immediately put me at ease. They were more than willing to reminisce about the time they spent with the youngster Katie Mulgrew. What follows are their memories, which they were kind enough to share with Now Voyager. As a drama coach, Father Philip F. Recker has had to shatter a few youthful dreams. "These kids come in and say, 'I'm going to be a star,' and you know very well they're not going to be," he said. "So you have to direct them into another area." But that was never the case with Kate Mulgrew. Kate was a protege of Recker's--a budding teenage actress in his high school drama club. For one year, Recker directed her in stage plays, watching as she learned and blossomed as an actress. Right away, Recker saw her talent. "She had a goal, and you knew she was going somewhere," Recker said. "She was on her way." Kate was 16 when she first met Recker; he was in his 30s. It was 1971, and she had just transferred to Wahlert High School, a Catholic, coeducational school of about 2,200. "Kate came to us in her junior year," Recker said. "I had known her before that," by watching her in other speech and drama performances, he said. "I always like to think she came (to Wahlert) because of the superior drama program," Recker joked. But he wasn't entirely kidding. Wahlert's drama department was highly respected, known as a program that demanded that students rise to professional standards. Such a challenge, Recker believes, was irresistible to Kate. "They all came to us with stars in their eyes; all kids do. Kate had those same stars, but she wanted to go with them," Recker said. "She always had confidence then, as she has confidence now." Recker was soon to learn how serious Kate was about an acting career. She took every word of direction, reaching deep inside herself to perfect her characters. "She would work and work and work," remembered Recker, now 64. "There's never any problem with 'Let's try this again.' Trying a different turn or twist or emphasis...Kate was always good at that." And she would try for as long as it took. "It didn't matter how long the rehearsals ran; that was fine with Kate," Recker said. "She was very giving." The hard work strengthened her acting skills, Recker said. But he added that he doesn't remember any particularly weak points about Kate's early acting. "A lot of things, she had to learn and grow into," Recker said. "But I never had any problems with direction. She could learn lines very easily, she remembered blocking very easily, and she always had suggestions." Kate was at Wahlert for only one year, graduating at age 17. While there, she played starring roles in three productions: the musical Fiddler on the Roof, The Lion in Winter, and Mary, Mary, a light comedy by playwright Jean Kerr. The Lion in Winter may well have been Kate's favorite, Recker suspects: She got to play the role of Eleanor, which was played by none other than Katherine Hepburn in the award-winning movie. It was, of course, this flinty actress whom Kate was immediately compared to when she took her commanding role in Voyager. "Kate wanted to work in that one [Lion] becase Kate Hepburn had done the movie version," Recker said. "She's always been enamored, I think, by Katherine Hepburn." Kate acted the part with dash, Recker said. "It was a very challenging role, and she did a very nice job. There are a number of long speeches, and she handled them nicely. It came off very well." In Mary, Mary, Kate played a nearly-divorced woman whose lawyer brings her and her husband back together. "He has this idea that there's a tax problem, and he gets them back at the apartment," Recker said. "Bob [Mary's husband] is going to remarry this Tiffany character. When Mary and Bob get back together, they start saying, 'Oh, remember when we did that or did this.' And it's pretty obvious that Bob and Mary belong back together." Mary, Mary was an experience for Kate in dinner theater--something Recker was experimenting with at the time. She performed the role in a large cafeteria where parents and other patrons enjoyed a formal meal while watching the show. "It gave the students a chance to operate kind of like in a theater-in-the-round," Recker said. "It's a more intimate kind of theater. Kate handled it very well. She liked it, I think, because your audience is your life blood, and there they were right in front of you." Kate hasn't forgotten those early audiences in Iowa. Sister Bernadine Curoe, Kate's high-school guidance counselor, remembers Kate coming back in the 1980s to do a performance at Loras College. The college also lies in Dubuque, and Curoe is now a guidance counselor there. "She was in our theater, and what a wonderful conversation we had afterward," Curoe said. "We renewed acquaintances. It meant a lot to me to have that time." Curoe remembers Kate, in her teenage years, as "a beautiful person. She was vivacious, outgoing, positive. She just radiated a sort of glow that would come through in her acting. There was a liveliness and a sparkled in her performances. She would really get into her roles. "Her high school productions were always much more because of Katie Mulgrew." Curoe remembers she was "always supporting Katie, encouraging her." But she doesn't remember Kate needing it: The girl was not in the habit of getting discouraged, Curoe said. "She was always sure she was going to act," Curoe said. "She was always willing to work. I don't think there was a lazy bone in Katie's body." But that didn't keep her from having fun. Recker remembers her as a bit of a socialit--less serious than her older brother, Tom, and more into merriment like her younger brother, Sam. "The three of them came together every morning. They had this car they drove to school--The Tank, as we called it," Recker said. It was a large, four-door, gas-guzzling sedan. "Tom was a very serious lad as I recall, and worked on the school paper. Sam came along and he was a fun guy. He was someone you could always joke with. "Kate was very friendly, willing to speak to anybody. She was not one who would only associate with the artistic group. She had friends among all the students--the rich, the poor, the talented, the less talented. She was a very popular person around the city." Recker still hears about Kate. Now a priest in Williams, Iowa, Recker says people will approach him and say, "I saw that student of yours on TV." "I didn't have that much to do with her, I think," Recker added with a laugh. "She had the talent and we gave her the vehicle to work with." Watching Voyager reminds Recker of the time Kate finally took her exit from Dubuque. After high school, she went to Clarke College for a year, then left to pursue her acting career. "She was going to leave and go to New York, and she stopped off at the high school to see me," Recker said. "I gave her the usual fatherly advice about how she wasn't ready for the big city, all those things you tell kids. She was only 18. So she listened very well, and then she got up. When she got to the door, she turned around, looked at the door and looked back at me, and said, 'You know, someday, by God, I'll be famous.'" Then she left. "And I thought, 'Yeah, I think you're going to make it, Kate,'" said Recker, recalling the moment with a chuckle. "I can still hear her saying it, and out the door she went, with that 'swish' she has. When I see her on Star Trek: Voyager, I think, she still walks that way; she has that kind of command." Recker's not surprised that Kate made it. Neither is Curoe. Fundamentally, they said, Kate had the fuel that would shoot her high in the drama world: Determination. "Kate's got that drive," Recker said. "And that's what it takes in that business. You can't take no for an answer if you want to get to the top." [Photos from "Harvest," the 1972 yearbook of Wahlert High School, Dubuque, Iowa.] LIFE IN DUBUQUE, IOWA by Rita Parkin Recently I've become a member of Now Voyager, but I've been a Trekker since 1969. Please allow me to introduce myself: I'm 41, married, mother of two, and a student transportation operator (school bus driver). I am also proud to call Dubuque, Iowa my hometown, which leads me to the reason for this article. When Michelle first approached me to write about Dubuque, possibly to expand on some things Kate refers to or to give a better glimpse into the soul of the community that influenced her, I was happy to help. Then fear and anxiety took hold. How could I possibly do this? I did so want to leave a good impression of this community. Then I recalled something my sister once told me: she believed I could do anything I set my mind to do. So with that and the help of God, here goes. First a little background on the origins of our town: Who was Julien Dubuque, and why is his grave important? In the later part of the 18th century, a French-Canadian miner and fur trader known as Julien Dubuc (Dubuque) became interested in the area of the upper Mississippi valley for its rich deposits of lead ore. He earned the trust and respect of the Fox Indians (Musquakie), whose village was located at the mouth of Catfish Creek, a tributary of the Mississippi just south of the present day city. Peosta, chief of the village, gave Julien exclusive permission to mine the lead. This region at that time was under Spanish domain, and Julien wanted to legally validate his claim to the mines. He called this land the "Mines of Spain," and petitioned the govenor of Louisiana who granted his request. The friendship between Dubuque and the Fox people continued to grow, and after his death in the early spring of 1810, Julien Dubuque was given a chieftains' funeral and buried on the bluff overlooking the Mississippi and the Fox village. The Fox, after a dispute with the Menominee to the north in 1831, decided to abandon their villiage and headed west into what became Kansas, then eventually settling back into central Iowa. As for the burial site of Julien Dubuque, in 1897 a group of civic-minded individuals wanted to erect a monument in his memory. The monument was constructed of limestone and designed in appearance of a castle's turret. For years this site has not only attracted many young lovers because of its secluded nature, but also the party crowd who were looking for an out-of-the-way hangout. The area now has become part of a 600 acre conservation park again known as the "Mines of Spain." Michelle was wondering about the type of cultural opportunities that were available in Dubuque. Culture! Growing up here in the '60s, culture was drinking your beer (Star) from a glass. Not to give you the wrong idea about Dubuque (DBQ), but we were hardly the cultural center of the midwest. A farming community, most definitely, where the two major employers were John Deere and the Dubuque Packing Co.--good paying, blue-collar, union jobs. Weekends were made for Euchere card parties, dances at the fairgrounds and the teen ramp dances (held at the newly constructed downtown parking ramps). There was the ever-popular Saturday bargain matinee, and of course church on Sunday. Then came the 1970's, when the entire nation was gearing up for the Bicentennial. Heritage fever struck DBQ and brought about positive growth. Restoration of two century old opera houses encouraged the fine arts to prosper. Today the Five Flags Theater hosts numerous theatrical productions and is the home of the DBQ City Youth Ballet and DBQ Symphony Orchestra, to name just a few. The Barn Community Theater continues its refurbishing of the Grand Opera House. The Barn (aptly named for the original building that housed this fledging repertoire) presents a variety of musicals, dramas, and comedies. Every summer they encourage several hundred DBQ area children to try out for the annual children's play performed in August. I don't think any child is turned away. (Brief personal note: both my children have been involved in this fantastic experience.) The month of March is "Music in our Schools" month. The All-City Choral Festival held at Five Flags brings over 1400 elementary, junior high and high school students together to raise their voices in harmonious song. All three high schools--Senior, Hempstead, and Wahlert--put away their rivalries and become one voice for a moving rendition of "Praise His Holy Name." Perhaps only in Dubuque could even the public schools make a joyful noise unto the Lord; most of the students are Catholic, anyway. Growing up Catholic in a predominately Catholic town--now there's a challenge! But hey, it was! Have you ever had to endure the look from Sr. Maryholywater because you forgot your chapel veil for the daily mass, then sit in total humiliation throughout the mass with a kleenex bobbypinned to the top of your head? Those were the days, before the Second Vatican Council in the mid-'60s brought about reform within the Church. Those were the days of strict adherence to canon law, and infraction meant you went to hell, directly to hell, did not pass purgatory and did not collect 200 indulgences. Of course we Catholics have a great "get out of hell free" card, the wonderfully uplifting sacrament of reconciliation (confession), and it is true what they say about confession being good for the soul. Dubuque is very Catholic due in part to the vast influx of German and Irish settlers in the mid 19th century who brought with them their faith and nurtured those beliefs in their children. Generations later we still encourage and strengthen the richness of our faith in our own children. Statistically--not recent--of DBQ's 60,000 residents, at least three fourths are Christian, with over one half of those being Catholic. We have a small Jewish population and one synogogue. By contrast, there are eleven Catholic churches within the city and close to forty in a twenty-five mile radius. This has had a lot of influence on all segments of our community, as evident in the public school system. On Wednesdays teachers give little homework due to the fact that this is religious education night (CCD). Now if I may, my own closing thoughts on Kate's command abilities which shine through Captain Janeway. Attending parochial schools, we were blessed with many powerful, positive female role models...although some were not very gifted in relating well to children, or to adults for that matter. Whether the nuns were Franciscan, Visitation, BVM, Presentation, or one of the other religious orders, we learned at a young age the exact meaning of Theodore Roosevelt's "Speak softly and carry a big stick." There was an unquestionable respect for these women, and they demanded nothing less. Their decisions were absolute, and you wouldn't dare challenge their authority. Unique to have a woman in charge--well, maybe to Star Trek, but not to the countless millions who grew up Catholic attending parochial schools! In loving memory of my only sister, Joanne, who passed away the day after Thanksgiving 1996. HAPPY [LATE] BIRTHDAY KATE 29 April 1997 Since it's Kate's birthday, I thought I would take this opportunity to gush. If you don't want to read Kate gush, then please feel free to move on, but I think that most of us wouldn't be here if we didn't feel the need to gush about Kate every once in a while. I joined this club almost a year ago after attending a Kate con in Orlando. I flew down there not knowing what to expect, and I hadn't joined the club because I wasn't sure whether or not I was really into Kate all that much, but into Janeway instead. Orlando hooked me, and I've been involved in a continual love affair with this woman ever since. She was funny, sweet, interested in the fans, and very, very gracious. When I gave her a picture that I had drawn, she was so incredibly sweet--about the picture and about my uniform--that I had to have someone tell me later what she said because I went all starry-eyed. I hadn't been back from Orlando for 12 hours before I wrote to Michelle and said "My check's in the mail." And I want to say thanks for everything that Kate's given me. Thanks for giving me a role model, not only in portrayals of Captain Janeway and Joanne Springstein (whom I adore), but also in Kate Mulgrew. So many stars today ignore their fans and make others' lives a living hell. But Kate has always been gracious to us. She talks with us, not to us, when she meets with us. She always acts interested, and whether she really is or not is beside the point; she cares enough to at least put on a front, although I really believe that she is genuine. She's not perfect, but she tries her damnedest to live by her own moral code whether it's popular to do so in Hollywood or not. I derive great strength from this, and I appreciate it more than I can say. Thanks also for being the kind of person who doesn't care what society says about how a woman should look, weigh, and act. I can't help but love a woman who says that she's had two children and should have a gut. Thanks for your dedication to Captain Janeway. I don't know of any other actor who would read a physics book to try to understand her character enough to ensure that she will be a good role model for young girls and women alike. You inspire me to push my limits to see how much I can accomplish. Thanks for being proud of your beliefs. I may not agree with all of them, but I appreciate the nerve it takes to say things that may not necessarily be politically correct. It encourages me to stand up for what I believe. Finally, thanks for the dear friends that I have met because of you. There are many people who I would not have met if it hadn't been for you, and a few of these are true soulmates who I would be truly lost without. Happy birthday, Kate. I love you for all of this and more. Love, Nancy Molik "I have crushes in different degrees and different ways. Kate Mulgrew, who has been on the show, I had an obsessive-type crush on her...I totally loved everything she did." --Rosie O'Donnell in TV Guide NOW VOYAGER AUCTION RESULTS 1) Signed "Resistance" script--Kathy Genova of Albany, NY. 2) Signed "Death Wish" script--Daphne Triplett of Mobile, AL. 3) Signed "Investigations" script--Becky French of Seattle, WA. 4) Signed "Rise" script--Jane Wilson of Isle of Wight, UK. 5) Signed "Maneuvers" script--Sharon Heath of Tacoma, WA. 6) 8x10 Autographed Cast Photo--Kathy Genova of Albany, NY. 7) 11x14 Autographed Cast Photo--Carolyn Branson of Paducah, KY. 8) Signed Caretaker novel--Sashi German of Ardmore, PA. 9) Collector Cards--Sarah Davidson of Shropshire, UK. 10) 8 X 10 Photos--Brian Hart of Columbia, SC. Congratulations to all and much thanks to everyone who participated! At the request of the winners, we are not listing the winning bids. We raised over $2100.00, the bulk of which will go to Incarnation Children's Charities in New York. We also raised several hundred dollars for UCLA's literature programs to sponsor Kate's reading of Bleak House; we learned of the event too late to publicize it here! *THE FUNNY PAGES* A HAIRY SITUATION by Lilith Sedai Looking into the mirror hanging on the wall of his quarters, Chakotay straightened his uniform collar meticulously. Should he leave the zipper pulled below the command red blazon, or poised just at the color break, or perhaps higher? He posed experimentally, giving the wall a hawklike stare. Yes, just at the line. Dapper. Dashing. He liked it. "Bridge," he intoned. "Bridge. Bridge." "Ship's time is 0558 hours." the computer spoke primly. He'd have to hurry. He made his way down the corridor, trying not to look rushed, and arrived at the turbolift a hair ahead of Janeway. Keeping his back to her, he didn't let her see the slight triumphant smile. "Bridge," he instructed the lift. Damn. He'd said it all wrong. His voice was too high and he didn't sound suave enough. He'd have to speak to his spirit guide about that. But it was time for the enigmatic stare. He tried it out on the far wall. "Do you have something in your eye? Perhaps you ought to go see the Doctor." Janeway looked at him with concern. He returned the gaze piercingly, and stopped when he realized his eyes had wandered to her hair. "Funny about these turbolifts," he remarked suddenly, trying to distract her. He thought he could detect the faintest fresh scent of her shampoo. "What's so funny about them?" She had him there. "They could decorate them or something, don't you think?" he stalled. "I'll get Neelix on that right away." Her dry tones bypassed him as he found himself fascinated by the curve of her hair, twisting slightly as it rose into its immaculate style. Sinuous. Sensuous. Yes, that was herbal shampoo. Fresh, sharp, with the faintest hint of balsam scent. Oh, to have his hands on that hair again! He found himself standing in the lift alone. Janeway was already several steps onto the bridge. Paris jabbed Harry with an elbow and Chakotay stepped out hastily to take his seat. Carefully keeping his eyes on the forward viewscreen and away from the Captain, he sat down. A horrible noise assaulted him, and the Conn officer's back jerked with desperately repressed hilarity. He reached down and produced a small rubber cushion, now flat, from beneath his posterior. "What...?" He heard choking from Harry's station, glanced over, and found Janeway with her head bent over, eyes hidden behind one slim hand as she tried not to laugh aloud. "Who..." his voice trailed off. He tried a laugh, which fell flat, and Paris's shoulders jerked harder. Trapped, the Indian gazed menacingly around the bridge, but no one met his eyes. He put the whoopie cushion aside, reaching for his placid face and failing utterly. "Very amusing, Mr. Paris." "Me?" the Conn officer wore a wounded look. "ME? Why do I always get the blame?" Janeway rose abruptly and headed into her ready room. Instantly, Paris gave Chakotay a pleading look, pointing vigorously at her back. Chakotay glared a threat at him, and Paris looked back earnestly, unflinching, continuing to indicate the Captain's receeding form. The door swished closed behind her. On a whim, Chakotay retrieved the cushion and examined it closely. Experimentally, he exhaled into it and closed the plug. He rose. In a few moments he reseated himself, hands empty. The turbolift arrived on the bridge, depositing more crew. THPHFRTTTT. Tuvok leaped upright, hands poised in a defensive pattern. Chakotay deadpanned, staring into the main viewscreen. "Mr. Paris," Tuvok's voice was soft and icy. "Hey!" Paris yelped. "It wasn't me!" He jumped up. "You can fingerprint the thing! Analyze it! I never touched it! He did it!" he indicated Chakotay frantically. "Nobody likes a snitch, Mr. Paris," Chakotay admonished sadly. "Surely nobody would believe a senior officer would do such a thing." Tuvok glanced between the two of them, his brow nearly furrowing with a frown. "Harry," Chakotay turned to the Ensign for confirmation. "Commander Chakotay didn't bring the whoopie cushion," Harry confirmed, employing the principle that discretion forms the better part of valor. He looked Tuvok full in the eye. "Neither did I. Sir." Tuvok's eyes narrowed at Paris. The young man's mouth worked, no sound emerging. He stood and stamped to the Captain's chair. "She did it!" he yelled, smacking the armrest. "She did it to get even with Chakotay for staring at her hair all the time!" "Security team to the bridge," Tuvok requested, sotto voce. "But... but..." Paris truly started to panic. "Bring scissors," Tuvok concluded, and Paris flinched, looking wildly for somewhere to flee. "Not for you, Lieutenant." Tuvok assured him, and the entire crew rotated to stare at the Vulcan with disbelief. He motioned his head in the direction of the captain's ready room. "We shall settle this once and for all, by removing the root cause of the problem." A nervous team arrived in minutes, bearing a pair of the Doctor's surgical shears. "Those are my best scissors," the Doctor complained through a comlink. "You'd better bring them back. And don't use them to cut paper." Tuvok switched him off and commandeered the scissors. "Come with me, Commander." The two men squared their shoulders and converged on the Captain's ready room. The door opened, and shut. Paris looked at Harry. Harry shrugged at Paris. "What do you suppose that thump was," Harry murmured. "I don't know. Do you recognize who's doing all that agonized squealing?" "Should we consult with Doc?" "I think we should do this." Paris retrieved the cushion. He filled it, and placed it in the Captain's chair. "Good move," Harry commented. The ready-room door opened, and shut, and a scene of après-holocaust emerged onto the bridge. "My scissors," the Doctor complained, his voice tinny as it emerged from the small speaker. "My God," Paris whistled softly. Chakotay emerged from the ready room, his uniform tattered. He held a handful of hair. Short, straight, dark hair. "My hair," Chakotay mourned, looking down at the pathetic fistful. Tuvok followed Chakotay closely, in possession of all his hair but with his uniform in mild disarray. He was brandishing the scratched and bent scissors cautiously and casting nervous glances behind them. "My mistake," he shoved the scissors into Chakotay's hands and vanished into the turbolift post-haste. The Indian stared at the scissors for a moment and hastily thrust them at the lieutenant leading the security team, who backed away, refusing to take them. "Time for my midmorning break," Chakotay announced, looking about in vain for a place to dispose of his double handful. "Give the hair to Neelix," Paris suggested. "Spaghetti tonight." Chakotay gave him a sour look and left the bridge with as much dignity as he could, managing not to run. The Captain emerged, cool and unruffled, every hair in place. Approaching her seat, she neatly intercepted the whoopie cushion, bouncing it on her palm with satisfaction. "Dismissed," she informed the security personnel sweetly. END *KATHRYN JANEWAY, FEMINIST HEROINE* THE ISSUE OF CELIBACY by Barbe Smith It all started with a reading of The Cloister Walk by Kathleen Norris and my not-so-petite mouth. Quite innocently I pronounced to the Now Voyager list that after reading the chapter on Celibacy, I could comprehend for the first time why a leader in a situation like Captain Janeway would voluntarily choose to remain celibate. What a can of worms I opened! So, here I am, a married woman of seventeen years, in the unlikely situation of being "Celibacy Champion Extraordinaire"! It's a situation with which I'm not terribly comfortable. Philosophical discussion aside on the merits (or problems) with a celibate lifestyle, most will agree that people who voluntarily choose a life without sexual activity in it are capable of living fulfilling lives. But the matter at hand is, how does this all relate to our, and the writers', interpretations of Captain Janeway? First season: Captain Kathryn Janeway is illustrated as a warm, touching, touchable leader. She governs unquestionably, but the compassion for her crew is evident even as she disciplines them for disobeying the rules. She spends her spare time in a Gothic Romance holodeck program flirting with Lord Burleigh, when she is not mourning the loss of her relationship with Mark. Trying to make a case for Janeway suddenly moving beyond all this physicality and channeling her sexual energies towards some higher purpose doesn't cut it. The captain of the first season, and into the second, seems intricately connected to touch and sensations, and she actually has to fabricate false relationships of a potentially physical nature to compensate for her loss. As the years have evolved, Janeway has become more complex (and as the writers try new approaches, more unpredictable). Kate Mulgrew, the actress, could very easily convince me in her portrayal of Janeway that this woman could voluntarily choose a course where sexuality is re-directed into other areas that could serve the whole ship community and make her more open to their needs. Unfortunately, with the rare exception of "Sacred Ground," the writers have squashed many of Kate's nuances by focusing on a Janeway who's based in science and dedicated only to Starfleet principles. This Janeway is currently inflicting herself with celibacy in the name of her career, which in and of itself is dooming the experiment to failure. If Janeway were a real friend of mine, I'd give her luck and encouragement in choosing a wise but difficult course in remaining celibate. But, after all, this is just a TV show, right? What would we rather see, Janeway meditating in her solitary quarters or meditating over Chakotay (or someone more worthy) in his? Philosophy is fine, but sex is what will ultimately bring in the ratings. And, since I'm no good at celibacy myself, what right have I to argue? Next time, I quote a book on the list, it'll be from Danielle Steele--she couldn't possibly cause half as much controversy! WHO IS THIS MAN? by Claire Gabriel An essay about Chakotay in the newsletter for Kate Mulgrew's fan club may appear at first to be inappropriate. But one of the ideas that led me to write this essay is that Janeway's character development on the show is more closely linked to Chakotay's character development than one might think. Until I saw "Unity," I did not realize how painful it can be to watch the man Chakotay has become. I cannot rid myself of the image of him lying on a bed, helpless, surrounded by a group of strong, proactive strangers to whom he is reacting. Yes, indeed, that's our guy. Even granted that he was in bad shape physically, this scene is eerily symbolic of what has happened to this man since the show started. The Chakotay we met in "Caretaker" and other first season episodes was a proactive man, while the Chakotay we've seen since has become more and more reactive. Some might call this character development, but to me it seems more like character assassination. I'm trying to talk about Chakotay in this essay as though he were a person who has changed, instead of a character who has been inconsistently developed. If I can do that, the fact that the show's writers have characterized him inconsistently will be more than obvious. One of the first things we see Chakotay do in "Caretaker" is sacrifice his ship and risk his life to protect Voyager. He is not reacting to anybody; it's his decision, and he makes and implements it with no fanfare. This is a strong, centered man who is sure of himself and confident in his own decisions, even after being severely shaken from discovering that Tuvok was a spy. After he's crashed his ship, he bounds off the transporter pad and grins gratefully at the attendant. And when Torres objects to Janeway's destruction of the Array, he stops her, with his hand and his quiet reminder: "She's the captain." Secure, confident, acting out of his own convictions. I, for one, was completely captivated by the guy. As the first season progressed, we continued to see the same Chakotay in different contexts. In "The Cloud," we saw his spiritual side, which was fascinating--not only because it was an interesting angle on the character, but because he radiated quiet conviction that the beliefs of his people were an integral part of his personality. In "Learning Curve," we saw a proactive Chakotay in the scene where he hits Dalby. I love this scene, and I don't enjoy violence or respect violent people. But it showed us a strong leader who knew when he entered that room what he was probably going to have to do to make his point, tried to make it without violence, then carried out his plan when he had to because it was his only choice in the circumstances. No way did he punch Dalby impulsively or reactively. He tried to talk first, and when that didn't work, he grimaced slightly ("I knew this wasn't going to work, but I had to try") and did what he had to do. He was also very supportive of the captain during the first season, leaving no doubt that he was comfortable as her second in command and, in the tradition of Trek first officers, standing behind her in ways that surely made clear to the crew where his loyalties lay. In "The 37's," originally intended as the first season finale, he put his hand on her shoulder to comfort her in one of her infrequent moments of emotional turmoil. In "Elogium" (originally intended as a first season episode), he asked the captain outright, "Including you?" when she said that the crew would start to pair off. Nothing suggestive about his tone or expression. He was almost shy about it, but he had to know, so he asked. But second season, Chakotay began to change. The first intimations of this were in "Tattoo." At the time, many of us were eager to see a Chakotay-centered episode because he had not been featured for so long--since "Initiations," an early second-season episode, when Chakotay was ready to risk his life for a Kazon boy--again, a very proactive choice. In "Tattoo," we got a man who wears a mark not because he believes in what it stands for, but out of grief and guilt following his father's death. A reactive choice, the first of many. We learned that his spirituality, which we had been led to believe was internalized and ongoing, did not really become a part of his life until he actually met the sky gods. We saw a grown up teenager who is still rebelling, sneering at his father's beliefs in the first part of the episode. The way he says "Rubber Tree people" in his early conversation with Janeway, and when he questioned aloud why a spacefaring culture would "live like this," made me begin to wonder whether I liked this man as much as I thought I had. And when he reactively embraced his people's beliefs in a matter of hours after apparently rejecting them all his life, I began to wonder if he was as strong, centered, and mature as I had always thought him to be. And that was only the beginning. "Maneuvers" was the real turning point. Here we see a Chakotay who is almost completely reactive--being pulled this way and that by his emotions and by what other people are thinking and doing. Former lover or not, he laid it on the line to Seska in "State of Flux" when he found out that she'd been raiding the food stores. Proactive, strong, loyal to his principles. In "Maneuvers," though, he permits her behavior to dictate his, almost as though he has no control over his own actions. And when Janeway calls him on it in the last scene, all he can do is mutter, "I thought I was doing the right thing." Compare this statement with "She's the captain," and it's clear how far Chakotay has not come since "Caretaker." It's ironic that the "Maneuvers" exchange takes place when he's in uniform while the "Caretaker" exchange takes place when he isn't. "Maneuvers" also exemplifies how Chakotay's character development plays a part in Janeway's. As he slips into reactive, even immature behavior, she has to deal with him on those terms. My opinion is that she handled the situation very well, but I know there are many others who thought she was too lenient with him. Then, in "Alliances," we have him making snarky remarks about her lack of imagination, and her making snarky remarks right back about "the Maquis way." This diminishes both of them; again, the problem is the changes in Chakotay make it more and more difficult for the captain to deal with him on a professional level. Then, take the first part of "Basics," where Chakotay has to ask his father what to do about the child he believes is his. I liked the scene because I thought what Kolopak said was well worth saying. But Chakotay...I found myself wondering what had happened to the man who seemed to be so grown up and centered when we first met him. This man couldn't even make a potentially life-changing decision until his [dead] father in effect told him what to do. "Unity" was the last straw. Throughout the entire episode, Chakotay was being acted upon instead of taking action himself. Never mind that it "wasn't his fault" that the collective had taken over his mind. His being mentally taken over is tragically symbolic of the changes he has undergone during the second and third seasons--the ultimate event in a long period of increasingly reactive behavior on his part. The writers of the show have allowed Chakotay to devolve rather than evolve, possibly in order to make Janeway look like a proactive captain in contrast to her reactive first officer. If that's the case--that is, if Chakotay's devolution was consciously intended in order to make Janeway "look good"--this was a terrible mistake. Nobody, real or fictional, can look good by putting someone else down. In a sense, this is what the show's writers have done. If I were in a position to talk with them, I would urge them to have a "Parallax" party. Sit down and watch that episode, start to finish, at least twice, with special attention to the scene where Chakotay goes to bat for B'Elanna when Janeway is looking to fill the chief engineer position. This last is my very favorite Voyager scene. Here we have two people very much in conflict--not in a snarky, ad hominem way as they were in "Alliances," but because they are at odds with regard to passionately held beliefs. Nobody accuses anybody of a lack of imagination. Nobody makes sarcastic cracks. They stick to the real issues, and even though they don't resolve them at this point, the reason they don't resolve them is that they're both right, at least in the present context--i.e., before Janeway really gets to know Torres and becomes aware of her capabilities. In this scene, as well as in preceding and succeeding scenes (Chakotay and Torres, Janeway and Torres, and Janeway and Chakotay at the end), we saw the real Janeway and the real Chakotay. I would like to see the writers take the Janeway and Chakotay of "Caretaker" and "Parallax," put those characters into the context of the new story. I realize that, with a TV action series, all the stories can't be character-driven. All I would ask is that the writers let the characters be themselves, as we saw them in the first season, instead of the creatures of plot that they have so often been in the interim. I'm certain that if this were done, we would see much more consistent characterizations than we have in the recent past, and this would be particularly true of Chakotay. I thought this man was somebody special, but his special qualities have been ignored by the show's writers, or watered down by them to such an extent that he is almost unrecognizable. Janeway has a hard time treating him like an adult because he so often doesn't behave like one. All of this is fixable. I just hope the writers fix it soon. Three seasons into the show, it's almost too late to repair the damage. *KATE MULGREW FILM FESTIVAL COLUMN* ONDERWEG NAAR MORGEN by Anneke Apperloo No, the title isn't a misprint, it's a Dutch soap based on Ryan's Hope. Since I was born in 1970, I didn't really have the opportunity to watch Ryan's Hope myself, which of course I deeply regret, so I can't compare the two, but I'll try to give you my most objective opinion on the Dutch spinoff instead. After I promised to write this review, I tried to watch it for a whole week, but I simply couldn't sit through it. I think it's just too complicated for me. Picture this: Julia is pregnant, but she's not very happy about it because she doesn't know whether the baby's father is her boyfriend Frank or his best friend Bob. She also hasn't figured out yet whom she wants to be with...Frank, who cheated on her several times in the past, but seems to have changed his ways now and says he couldn't live without her (somehow that reminds me of someone familiar), or Bob--and what she sees in him is a mystery to me. I mean, an affair is usually not based on the fact that the other person is nice to talk to. Of course it's not his fault that he's going bald--not yet as bald as no man has gone before--but why do men who look a lot better without it grow beards? To make up her mind, Julia meets with a mind reader in a restaurant, who tells her the baby is Bob's after waving her hand over a photo of each of the men. Julia's response is something like "Oh, yes, I always thought so, he's the one I really love" and then she goes home to Frank to tell him how much she loves him and that she's convinced the baby is his. (This is where I lost track completely...) In the meantime, Frank's mother, who just started a divorce while her husband is abroad, and is getting sued by two of her stepchildren to prevent her from getting the house, has found herself a new lover about Frank's age, who moved in with her right away for convenience, while Frank's brother is making a pass on the former--also quite mature--lovemate of their mother's new boyfriend. And this is only a very small part of the whole story! When I watched Onderweg naar Morgen for the first time (by accident, some time ago), I wondered why one of the main character's names was Kate, which most certainly isn't a Dutch name. However, her last name puzzled me even more in connection with the first, the literal translation being "Livelong" (and prosper?). The pieces suddenly fell into place when I read the credit titles: 'Based on Ryan's Hope'. Now, this Kate character is no longer in the series. Since I missed why, I asked a friend of mine, who watches more regularly. She also didn't know all the details, but said that Kate had indeed suddenly vanished from the face of the Earth, leaving behind Frank's stepsister--the nice one, not the one suing her step-mother, the one Frank had an affair with--with a broken heart. Yes, they made her a lesbian - don't ask me why. It must be sheer coincidence, however, that at about the same time one hundred thousand guilders had mysteriously disappeared from the safe at the hotel where this Kate was the manager. I'm quite sure we haven't seen the last of her yet (although she's probably coming back with a 'new face'), but I don't think I'll be watching when she returns. I'm sorry to report that I don't expect Onderweg naar Morgen can make up in any way for missing Ryan's Hope... At the moment we have three Dutch soap series. Next to On the Way to Tomorrow (yes, that's how it's translated), there's Gold Coast and Good Times, Bad Times, although Bad Times, Worse Times probably would have been a more appropriate title for the latter. However, I like this one best. Unfortunately, all of these series lack someone like Kate Mulgrew to keep the level up. (To be honest, I think someone with ten percent of her talent would be a great improvement.) Right before typing over this review I had a quick peep at Onderweg naar Morgen; perhaps it's a little more addictive to me than I want to admit. Julia is really starting to crack up completely. I'll just have to watch every now and then to make sure whether she and the baby are going to be all right, and of course to find out who the baby's father really is. I mean, she could have been abducted by an alien wanting to procreate, or maybe she even made herself pregnant with some innocent man's DNA... *THE PEOPLE PAGE* NANCY MALONE By Alana Voeller Nancy Malone, who directed "Coda," has done it all--actress, director, Emmy-winning producer, studio executive, teacher, and published poet. In the last nine months, I've been fortunate to get to know her. She graciously agreed to take time from her busy schedule to meet me for dinner on April 14. What follows is a glimpse into a career of this multi-talented woman, who is refreshingly honest and to the point. She is also willing to share her knowledge and experience with those who seek it. NV: Nancy, how did you get started directing? NM: I 'd been producing movies of the week. On this one particular film, the network had requested I hire a particular director, one whom I felt was inappropriate--and that was because I knew him, from having worked with him as an actress. I didn't feel that he could be sensitive to the material. I expressed my concerns, but I was told to use him nonetheless. The result was disastrous. I made a promise to myself then that I would never be in that position again. What I was really saying was, I should have been able to step in and direct it myself. Not being a DGA [Directors Guild] member at that time, I was not able to do anything. So I went to the AFI [American Film Institute] and got involved in the women's directing program. In those days you got $1600 to $2,000 to make a film. I made two short films. Then I started all over again, looking for an agent who would take me on as a director. Women directors were a rarity 12 years ago. I had a terrible time. I went for a year without a job. Esther Shapiro [of Spelling Productions], who had been a great fan of mine as an actress, was doing Dynasty. So I called up Lynn Loring, who was head of Spelling Development, and suggested she meet with me. We met, and I showed her my film. She agreed that I should be directing Dynasty. Esther, who created Dynasty, gave me the formidable assignment of directing the 100th episode. I said, "Couldn't I do, like, 98 or 103, 'cause everyone is going to be watching this show?" Esther said, "You'll either sink or swim." I went to the set every day, even though my assignment was two months away. I observed every day. I had some lovely directors who helped me. I said, "I'm here to learn." I had to prove I was strong, despite the fact that I was very frightened. I had to be strong or the crew would have had no respect for me. The result was that Joan [Collins] used to ask for me every season. So I became a very big fan, and friend to her, and she to me. I went on to do many more Dynastys and other Spelling shows, including of course Kate's show Heartbeat. NV: How does it feel to work in a field that is dominated by men, where there are less than 10 percent of women directing? NM: Lonely. There are few women on the set. It is still a male dominated business. So it's called "adjust and make nice." When I was in an executive capacity, I had no mentor, because there was never anyone above me. NV: So you became a mentor for others ? NM: Yes. I bring a lot of people on the set when I'm working. Young or middle aged or whatever, women directors who want to try and learn. I believe in that. I believe in mentors. The ones that I have had are the gentlemen who were kind enough to help me. They were few and far between. NV: What are you most proud of? The acting, directing, or producing? You've done it all. NM: I'm proud of the acting. I've liked some of the things I've directed and some of the things I've produced. I'm not satisfied. There is always something I want to change or go back and fix. When I feel I've accomplished the intention of the story, when it's been successfully told, I feel OK. NV: What are your favorite projects to direct ? NM: I haven't been able to break into half hours [sitcoms]. I love comedy. I love the rehearsal process. Because of the time constraints, one rarely gets the chance for long rehearsals on one hour episodic [television]. NV: How did you come to direct Voyager? NM: Kate had wanted me to direct a show and she knew one was coming up that would feature her. She wanted the producers to meet me, and set up an appointment with Jeri Taylor and Merri Howard. I couldn't have been more impressed with their graciousness and thoughtful questions. A few days later they called to tell me I was booked for Kate's episode. NV: How was directing Star Trek different from the other things you have done ? NM: For one thing it is another language. There are tons of things to learn. There's a directors manual which introduces one to the many backstories and details of the permanent sets. NV: It's like going to school. NM: It really is. One has to learn a whole different technique, language and approach. The show has definite has a style. It was a fabulous experience and I'm looking forward to the next one. NV: You worked with a lot of special effects? How was it? NM: While I was being interviewed, I told Jeri and Merri that my special effects experience was limited. They assured me that it would not be a problem. "We are not hiring you for your talent with special effects. We have special effects people." The effects man was extremely helpful, and it all worked out beautifully, I think. NV: Do you see any similarities between Kate's character on Heartbeat, Joanne Halloran, and Captain Janeway? NM: They are both leaders. Strong women. They set the tone. NV: In regard to "Coda," the script has Chakotay burying is head in his hands when Janeway dies for the final time on the planet. Whose call was it to have him cradle Janeway in his arms? NM: Chakotay is very emotional at this point. He could have cried and covered his face. But Robert felt that connection with Janeway was more truthful. He was absolutely wonderful! NV: So it was your decision with Beltran and everybody to do the scene that way? NM: The process dictated the staging. NV: It was believable to do it that way. Someone you care about is lying on the ground dying. NM: Yes. By holding her, he in an essence did not want to let her die. He demonstrated a connection to her through their closeness by not letting her go. NV: When they finally revive Janeway on the planet she starts to call the alien "My fath..." and stops, and refers to him as the alien. Was that choice yours or Kate's ? NM: Kate's. Kate has such inner resources She is both an intuitive actress and a trained technician. Her instincts are always right on. It was a wonderful touch--the truth came out of the emotion of the scene. It's a joy to direct her. She is always the first one on the set. She's the one waiting for everyone else. She is a true professional. She reminds me a lot of the way I used to work. She has such a professional demeanor, such a real care about her work. NV: She knows her script, too. NM: Unbelievably. She's absolutely word perfect. She is Janeway. How she learns the different technobabble so quickly and understands it is a total mystery to me. NV: She has said many times, if she doesn't know what she's saying, it won't be believable. NM: Absolutely. A lot of people don't take that time though. NV: Whose idea was the rose in the ending scene? It's a very romantic thing to bring. NM: "Coda" was my first experience with Voyager. The show has such dedication and formula that if you stray off it, it's not really perceived as creative; it's perceived as as being rebellious, not paying attention to the history of the show. Since I was so thrilled to get the show, I wanted to do a great job. I didn't want to make mistakes. The scene was the tag of an extremely important episode, it is a substantial moment in thir relationship. The idea of the flower was suggested, sort of an acknowledgement of their past and future. I asked myself, would Chakotay do that, would that be in his character? Would that be going over the line? Would it be a rose or some other flower? There were a million options. The hour was late and I could not reach anyone to get approval. So we conferred, and we decided to take the chance. Thank God everyone seemed to like it. NV: Jeri Taylor kind of opened the door with the champagne and moonlight sail on Lake George. NM: Right. NV: Webster's New World Dictionary says that "coda" means, in music, a final passage. NM: There was another title [originally]: "Fractals," which is a phe nomenon related to the growth of crystals. NV: Do you have any humorous anecdotes from working on the show? They seem like a good group of people. NM: These actors are wonderful.They are dedicated to the characters they play. They question the writers consistently for truth. They were helpful, kind and patient with me. The humor on the set comes from the security of people who trust one another and have worked long hours together. Picardo and Beltran are hysterically funny. Many times I had to turn away, because I was laughing so hard at something they had said or done. I tried not to lose control. It was a terrific experience. Robert [Beltran] does impersonations--he does one of Bob Dole that was so hysterical. It would break the tension, if there was anybody doing something like that. Of course the crew adores them. And I do too. NV: Do you think you have an advantage as a director because you come from an acting background? NM: Definitely yes. I believe everyone who directs should go to an acting class. Go to an audition, get "the part." Find out what it's like to walk into that room and read for a bunch of strangers. Go on a set, be lonely and scared, hoping you won't mess up. That's what people should do before they become a director. They'd have a real empathy. NV: What advice would you have for women who want to become directors? NM: Enroll at a good film school. Try and get a mentor. Entice the mentor into letting you come on the set and observe. Join Women In Film. Watch old movies without the sound. Try and understand why a director chose certain camera angles. Learn as much lingo as possible. Try and understand the use for closeups, long shots and medium shots. Talk to as many directors as possible. NV: There is a time capsule that will be opened in the 24th Century. What are you going to put in it that represents you ? NM: I don't have any solid objects that I would contribute. But if essences could be accepted, I would include humor, ethics, compassion, and empathy--real gifts given by God. SUE HENLEY--THE SEQUEL By Michelle Erica Green Sue, Kate's stand-in, has appeared on these pages before both as a subject and as a writer. Last year, she and Kate appeared in a sensational tabloid article which claimed Kate saved Sue's life! Since she has now gained eternal Trek fame as "Ensign Turbolift," who spoke to a possessed Doc in the lift in "Darkling," we figured it was time to talk to Sue again. This is Now Voyager's first interview conducted entirely by e-mail, on April 6th, 1997. NV: Tell us the truth behind that National Enquirer headline--"Kate Saves Sue!" As I recall, the Enquirer said that you fell down a hill and cracked your ribs while filming "Basics II," and Kate tried to rescue you at great personal risk. Give us the real scoop! SH: Here's what really happened. I was doing a background shot with a bunch of other Starfleeters. As Kate and I are about the the same height, we both wear heels with our uniforms. Mine are the very thin wedgies Kate wore the first season. As we--the loyal Starfleeters--ran after our Captain to see what all the screaming was about, I was running on the side of a hill, fast, in three-inch heels. Being the highly coordinated person that I am, I promptly (right after "action") lost my footing and began rolling down the incline. I tried to stop myself a few times--I almost succeeded once--but was afraid I'd break my arms, as I was rolling fast. Here's where Kate comes in. She was standing at the top of the hill. She said she thought at first I was just clowning around until she heard me yelling each time I rolled. Then she yelled, "Someone stop her!" Apparently I was headed for a bit of a drop-off at the bottom. I seem to remember some of the guys running down the hill after me, trying to stop me. Finally, near the bottom, either it leveled off and I slowed or someone stopped me. I started to get up and someone told me to stay and not move. I hurt my back a little, and bruised or fractured ribs, and I was a little banged up. They called the paramedics, and the rest, as they say, is history. Embarrassing history, at that! Kate and I laughed later when I showed her the article. She never came to the bottom of the hill, and a few other points in it were a tad iffy! I told her she had saved me again. She has saved me in one way or another many times since I started this job, so I don't mind her getting credit for this one at all! NV: In all seriousness, what kinds of risks are there in doing stunts and difficult shots? Who does stunts for Kate when they require expertise about how to take a hard fall, or that sort of thing? SH: As for there being risks in stunts or difficult shots, we don't have many of those that I have to do. I have stood in for stunt people before, but I only have to do the fall or punch in very slow motion for lighting angles. Kate does most of her own stunts, and she does them well! She has had a few stunt women, but they don't get to work much. As there is a specific union for stunt people, I am not allowed to do stunts at full speed (thank you God). NV: Have you been injured on the job before, and do you ever worry about the hazards of your line of work? SH: I have never been injured on the job before this. I really don't have much in the way of hazardous work in this show so far. NV: What's the hardest thing physically you've had to do as Kate's double--did you have to carry Kes in "Sacred Ground," or crash over the table in "Macrocosm"? SH: Nothing too hard. The most taxing would be running up and down those darn Jeffries tube ladders again and again...and again. I didn't have to lift Kes in "Sacred Ground." I did, however, have to support the weight of her stand-in, Jennifer Riley, for what seemed like an endless lighting session! I didn't have to crash over the table in "Macrocosm"--at least, not at the speed at which her stunt woman did. I've had enough rib pain, thank you very much. NV: Have you ever stood in for any scenes which really made your hair stand on end, like Janeway getting tortured by the Borg or murdered by the Doc? Did you double for Kate in "Coda" during the scenes where Janeway was supposed to be dead? Was that unsettling? SH: I did double for Kate in "Coda." I don't know what got into the final cut, but I was her in sickbay and both standing next to Chakotay and laying on the ground when she was dying on the planet. One scene which was particularly unsettling in doubling for Kate would have to be the one in "Coda" on the planet. Standing next to Chakotay so my legs could be Kate while she was lying there dying was not easy. I have never seen Chakotay too emotional, so watching him cry at her death made me cry. I had a hard time watching that. NV: Of any scene you've worked as a body double for Kate and then watched her film, which is the one you most wish you could have performed on camera yourself? SH: That's a tough one. Naturally, I would have to say mouth to mouth with Chakotay! Actually, after watching him pound on her chest so many times, maybe I wouldn't. That looked like it hurt! NV: Did you get to have Robert Beltran panting into your mouth and massaging your chest in "Coda"? If so, how does it feel to be the envy of thousands of women all over the world? SH: No, I didn't receive CPR from him. They were going to, but the angle would've revealed my face to camera. There was a moment where he was being his usual playful self, however. I was laying there on the ground waiting for the camera set up. I had my eyes closed, resting. If you haven't noticed, the captain seldom if ever lays down or even sits for long on the show. So I take my rest where I can get it! Robert quietly said, "Sue." When I opened my eyes, his face was less than an inch from my own, which took me completely by surprise as I thought we weren't doing that shot! He smiled the famous Beltran mischeveous smile and he and Kate laughed before I punched him! NV: Have Janeway's ongoing hairstyle changes affected you as well as Kate? How do you personally feel about the Great Janeway Hair Controversy--which hairstyle has been your favorite? SH: Janeway's hairstyles only affect me slightly when I have to double her in picture. For standing-in, I just put mine in a ponytail for lighting. I'd have to say my all-time favorite hairstyle for Janeway is when she wears it down, which is not often. I do think the ponytail is immensely superior to that so-wonderful bun. NV: Have there been any scenes where you felt like you just couldn't fill Kate's shoes--that only she could make a certain moment work? SH: I could NEVER fill Kate's shoes. I certainly have at times felt intimidated by my own self-doubt when asked to even read her lines off camera. She is one talented lady! I get nervous even thinking about actually doing a scene (as Ensign Turbolift) with her on camera, though I would love to try. NV: Tell us how you became Ensign Turbolift! It's wonderful that you got a line--is that something you had to ask for, and wait, and hope they'd give you? Who decides which extras get to speak? SH: How did I get that part? I have no idea. It came out of left field. Only one other time in the history of both TNG and Voyager has a stand-in gotten a line, as far as I know. I was positive it would never happen. It seemed an unwritten rule. I got a phone call saying Alex would like Susan Lewis (Roxann's stand-in) and myself to read for a small part. I thought the phone call was a joke. I went to the set, read the part--originally it was "hello" and a lot of silent acting) and in spite of Susan being a terrific actress, I got it! Wow! I have Merri Howard and Jeri Taylor to thank for that chance, and thank them I do, and did, profusely. I am sure Kate said something also, which of course she denies emphatically. NV: Is Ensign Turbolift, like the Doctor, doomed to go on forever without a name, or do you think she's one of the Delaney sisters...and if so, which one? SH: Ooooh, I sure hope Ensign is one of the Delaney sisters! I hope she's both Delaney sisters! NV: Are you now afraid of being killed off, like all the rest of the ensigns on the show? SH: I have no doubt that Ensign will be killed off eventually. Though that would mean they couldn't use me in background ever again, unless I were an alien of some kind. That would be a very sad thing as I enjoy being Starfleet--even more, now that I don't have to wear that "lovely" black wig any longer. NV: If you could have one moment of glory onscreen on Voyager, what would you like your character to do? SH: One moment of glory I would like Ensign Turbolift to have would be to somehow save Janeway's life on my way out, then have a small farewell in sickbay in a scene with Janeway. NV: What do you think of the Bathing Beauty holoprogram? Will we ever see you in the background in a bikini--or have we already? SH: The Bathing Beauty holprogram was okay for a while. Though’ honestly, I didn't mind the half naked men, I didn't really understand where they were trying to go with that program. Me, in a bikini in the background? Surely you jest! No, no, no. You have seen me in a rather revealing dress, but not if you happened toblink, thank God! NV: How has the climate on the set changed over the past two years of filming? Is it more relaxed and social, or are people more anxious to get their work done and get home, now that you're in a routine? SH: The climate on the set has become much more relaxed over the past two years. People are still anxious to get their work done and go home. After all, fourteen hours on your feet is nothing to sneeze at, but the feeling of one great big family has become rather comfortable and nice. NV: Is it difficult to come back after hiatus and pick up where you left off, or adapt to the changes the producers have made over the break? SH: It is always a bit difficult to come back after hiatus and pick right up again, but it is kind of exhilarating. I don't know what changes the producers will make this time, and that is a bit nervewracking. Hopefully, nothing too earthshattering (so to speak). NV: Have you personally been witness to the practical joke war between Kate and Tim Russ? Who's winning? Have you seen those butt shots in her trailer that Kate talks about at conventions, and does Tim really show up naked on the set? SH: I have indeed been witness to the practical joke war between Kate and Tim. Who's winning? I'm sorry, Kate, but I would have to say Tim is ahead at this point! Though that one with the clothes taken out of Tim's trailer was a good one, it would've been better if he didn't seem to like the chance it gave him to not wear clothes! I can always tell when Kate is planning an attack, she quietly calls people to her and whispers and they leave with sneaky smiles on their faces, and the next thing you know, Tim has been had. NV: What's been the funniest set shenanigan you were around for? Does Beltran really do Sinatra and Brando imitations? Which of the castmembers is the biggest cut-up? SH: I think the funniest set shenanigan I have been around for a few times is when John (Ethan) does his famous mooning bit. He purposely leaves his pants loose till he gets to the set and then suddenly bends over towards the camera and everyone else. He chooses the most quiet, inactive moments to do this and it is a riot. The biggest cut-up, that is a hard one! I would say this is a tie between Robert, Tim and John. Everybody always gets into the act though, so they are all cut-ups! Yes, Robert does do Sinatra and Brando imitations. A lot. A very, very lot. His Brando is not bad, though, even hearing it seventy-five times. (Sorry, Robert!) I saw him in Hamlet during the first week of previews--what a pleasant surprise! He made the play come alive. Jennifer Riley (Kes's stand-in) is understudying Ophelia, so I am going back--it should be interesting to see how Robert's performance grows, and I can't wait to see Jen do her thing. NV: What are you up to over hiatus? Are you working on something? SH: I am not doing much over hiatus. I am desperately trying to get my business license for my herbal company. I keep running into snags and it is very frustrating. I also am completing my book, finally. I haven't really told many people about it. It's a novel based on some experiences I have had; it is pretty scary and (of course) also involves a love interest. I have been writing it for a year or so, so it is great to finally be almost at the end. I was wondering how it would turn out! But the rewriting phase will soon begin and that usually takes some time, according to some publishers I have talked to. So I still have a ways to go. NV: Do you consider yourself a fan of Voyager? Do you watch all the episodes, even if you didn't work on them? SH: I am indeed a fan of Voyager. I am sorry to say I have not been able to watch all the episodes. Most of the time I am working and miss them. I recently got a VCR though (I had to be pulled screaming into this century), so I will be able to watch them all now. NV: Tell us what you wish the producers would do with the series. Do you think the ship should get back to the Alpha Quadrant? Which of the aliens are your favorite? Which of the guest stars? Do you like Janeway's holonovels? If you could write a holodeck program for her, what would it be? Are there any stories you wish the writers would pursue? Finally, do you think Janeway and Chakotay should get together? (Emotionally, I mean--not necessarily in the sack!) SH: It would be interesting if the ship did get back to the Alpha Quadrant. I kind of enjoy all our new aliens, though, and I don't think we'd get to have them back there. My favorite nasty aliens are the Vidiians. Of course, Q is my all-time favorite guest star. John is a very sweet man and wonderful to work with. I like the holonovels. The costumes and sets are fabulous. If I could write a holodeck program for her I think it would be one where she lets it all hang out. It would be one where she could let go of all her command responsibilities, all her personal hangups and worries. Even though I would write it for her to relax and fall in love (gee, I wonder who that guy would be) and be a normal person, I have a feeling that somehow it would turn out to be something like Xena anyway, because Janeway simply has to be one who does all the saving. She can't help herself. I do think Janeway and Chakotay should get together. I don't think they should get together in the sack (okay, maybe I do want that, just a little), but they should sit down and have a real discussion about how they truly feel about each other, not just a "warrior story." SPELL IT OUT!! *REVIEWZZZZZZZZ* FAVORITE SON Must The Powers That Be keep on giving us episodes like this, i.e. Melrose Place stories that aren't anywhere near plausibility in the Trek universe? The preview didn't lie for this episode, which had me dreading it the entire week before it aired. It's evident that the fans realize that Voyager is different from Melrose Place, or is at least supposed to be. Do TPTB know this? I'm having doubts. With my optimistic mind, I was hoping that all of these sex-driven plots would be done for the season with "Blood Fever." Most of them just don't work in Star Trek format, and "Favorite Son" is a prime example. Here's why: the plausibility factor. Star Trek has the luxury of stretching reality thanks to its futuristic format, but the fans will accept the extension only so far. First of all, if I were Captain Janeway, I would've thrown Harry in the brig for starting an unnecessary attack. Without the knowledge that the enemy ship was going to attack, I personally would've been very heated over Harry's sudden actions. Next, I felt that the announcement that Harry really isn't human would've posed more questions. After all, he has been human all of his life, but all of a sudden develops spots showing otherwise. This gave me flashbacks of "Threshold," when Tom mutated into a salamander. Harry seemed to take the news of being a member of another race rather easily. In fact, he really didn't seem to care very much; being interested in the culture seemed the apex of his curiosity as to why he was now suddenly a native of this planet. Also, put yourself in Janeway's shoes. Wouldn't you be very suspicious of what's going on? I certainly would be. She also bought the story too quickly.I would've enjoyed seeing her, Tuvok, and Chakotay start an investigation. This would have been more in character for her. One thing that I commonly enjoy with any story is character interaction, which shined in the scene between Harry and B'Elanna. It's been awhile since these two have really talked; this might be because of the developing Paris/Torres relationship. I enjoy these two together. They've been great friends since "Caretaker," and their dialogue from then to now has always been worthwhile. Oh, and I'm sure someone out there agrees with me -- Spot is surely a nickname B'Elanna will use to tease Harry for quite some time! I pray that this will be the last sex episode for season three. I'm burned out on these lame story lines and previews that forewarn me how much my stomach will turn a week beforehand. Enough is enough! --Charlynn Kate Smith This episode "Favorite Son", was overall okay, but there was nothing really to grab and hold one's attention for the entire hour. Plus, there were several problems which did not help the lackluster plot. A planet full of women claim that Harry is one of them. They want him to stay and take his place his among them. But they leave out a very crucial fact about what men are supposed to do. Apparently, the men are supposed to marry three women and help propagate the species. Instead of an exploration of a society where there is a shortage of men and what they do to cope with it, we got men being tied up and being left as dried-up skeletons with all their life sucked out of them. This episode is like a male nightmare come to life. Whose idea was this? It wasn't necessary to have the Taresians be life-sucking vampires. It could have been shown that the Taresians were good people but just desperate. This would have made the ending much more poignant because Harry's departure would harm the planet even if he is just one DNA donor. Another problem that I had was the lack of skepticism from the people on Voyager with regard to the Taresians' story about Harry being one of them. I expected Harry to be more skeptical, but he just seemed to quietly accept it. Something like this which challenges his entire world view should be met with more resistance. The good thing about this episode was the characterization of the people on Voyager. Janeway came across as being tough but compassionate. Chakotay did not look like an incompetent fool. I liked the scene between Tom and Harry at the end which helped to illustrate what each gets from the friendship. I also liked the fact that this episode clarified once and for all that Janeway is a mother figure to Harry Kim. So, overall this episode was okay. But nothing that makes me happy I am a Star Trek fan. --Shalini Gupta I thought this was an intriguing and well done episode. There were some things that I took exception to, but over all I liked it very much. I think that Garrett Wang did a nice job of acting in this one. He seems to be getting more comfortable with the role, or Harry Kim is getting more comfortable, I'm not sure which. I thought there was just enough action and character interaction. I loved Chak jumping over the Ops console! There were some wonderful Janeway looks; she seemed extremely strong in this episode, just the way Captain Janeway should be. I thought that it was good that Harry's perception of Janeway as a mother figure was finally addressed. It has been there all along, but it is nice to see something done with it. There are so many things that we attribute to the characters, but often it feels like we're basing that on what we wish was there rather than what has really happened. I hope that this signals a new and better approach to character development and attention to detail by the writers. It's great! Of course, I was leery of the Taresians from the get-go. It's often the case that a seemingly benevolent race isn't. That's okay; I chalk it up to genre. There were also parts of it that reminded me of the exploits of the Founders. I thought, "Oh man, not another race that deposits their offspring all over the galaxy to learn about other races," until they discovered that the alien DNA had been an implant of sorts. I was glad that the show went in this direction. I suppose there were people who were not thrilled with the fact that the all-female race turned out to be killers of men. Hey, all Kazon men were goons. I think it's fairly evenly spread, as long as this doesn't become a trend. The main reason they chose a scantily clad group of young women probably has more to do with The Powers That Be's idea of what they have to do to attract viewers. Personally, I find this sad. Trek sells Trek, plain and simple. I don't think they need all the bare bodies and mindless sex and violence that has been implied (though not produced) in the trailers. It would be sad to see Trek spiral down into mediocrity simply because some people in power think that sex and violence sell, rather than good storytelling, character development, and drama. I really liked the interaction at the end between Harry and Tom! That was definitely good character interaction and in just a few lines they told us a lot and showed character growth. It also didn't wrap up the episode nice and tightly in the last five minutes. It left them still not sure how they feel about themselves, but knowing that at least they're not alone in their uncertainty. This is good storytelling. --Siobhan Wolf Voyager sinks to an all time low. Putting it mildly, this episode was crap. From the outset, we saw Kim violate command, take control of the ship, and fire the phasers based on his "gut feeling." I just didn't buy it. Harry has always been loyal to Janeway. He's been flying the friendly stars with her for three years. It's been established in other episodes that he respects her judgment. When she asked him to justify his decision, don't you think he might have responded quickly before just firing at the ship blindly? Yeah, yeah. There wasn't enough time. He was infused with alien DNA which just made him more agitated in combat. I know the story, although Kim had enough RATIONAL thought to break free of the vultures as they held him prisoner later on. Why couldn't this same thinking have been applied in the beginning? Even more troublesome was Janeway's response. I didn't buy it. Does she really want any officer to fire the phasers on a hunch? Even if there's a reasonable explanation to be offered later. Okay, she did lock Harry up and send him to the Doctor to be examined. But, what if Harry were wrong? Were there to be no consequences to his actions? Yeah, it got worse. Harry struggled with disowning his Earth parents and Voyager in order to join a group of toga-wearing women who steal men's DNA as they're being blindfolded. (The women look like extras from Paradise Isle if anyone remembers "Wonder Woman.") This advanced civilization has a ship which can blow Voyager out of the skies, but the women who comprise the main populace fought with surgical implements, batons, and DNA extracting perfume bottles when threatened on their homeworld. Of course, Harry found all this out before he's turned into a DNA zombie and survived with minor damage. The episode ends with a preachy analogy to sirens. If I were in a writer's meeting listening to this plot line, I think I would start worrying about the mental health of those in the room. Either they're overworked, indulging in substances we shouldn't know about, or wondering just how bad it can get. Hint: It's bad. Really bad. Could we have something thought-provoking? That's really why I started watching Star Trek in the first place. There's so much to explore with the characters of Janeway and crew, and the weak story lines seem to diminish their human qualities in favor of action, weekly group orgies, and formulaic nonsense. Janeway is now so icy cold that we only get a glimmer into the human captain we got to know during thefirst and second season. I can accept that maybe she was too emotional as a captain then, but there was a depth to the character. You could forgive those moments of emotion because she was in a tight, horrible situation being forcibly removed from home, loved ones, and the life she's left behind. Now, it seems as if Janeway has no life. The only time we see the real human is at a funeral or some function that absolutely demands an emotional response. Frankly, I liked Janeway better when she communicated with her crew -- when she had a little empathy for them and wasn't so hardened. --Ian Forsyth Harry Kim goes to a planet where beautiful, fawning women introduce him to great peril disguised as kinky sex. Sounds like Lisa Klink fell asleep watching Monty Python and the Holy Grail. This may be the only Voyager episode so far that turned out to be even more stupid and sexist than UPN's promos. I'm sure Garrett Wang loved making this one, since Harry, the Starfleet altar boy, doesn't get much attention from women, but why should we have to suffer for his fun? And who though we'd fall for that phony literary analogy thrown in at the end (and which wasn't even accurate anyway, since these characters were more like the Lotus Eaters, or even Circe, than the Sirens)? And what would posses a woman to write a teleplay that portrays us as either mother figures (as in Harry's embarassing little Freudian psychodrama about Janeway) or sexual predators? Well, anyway... I just hope this was a fluke (judging by the next couple of episodes, it seems to be). Lisa Klink owes us a masterpiece to make up for this. --Loey Lockerby I approached this episode with no expectations, and I actually liked what I saw, but not for the reasons you might think. Let's remove ourselves from the realm of the sirens and throw away the cranky reviewer's hat for a moment. "Favorite Son" was redeemed by a series of throwaway lines and character moments, few which had anything to do with Harry and his role as sperm donor. First of all, the crew seemed to be having a good time, and they were doing so while on duty, not while spending time in that ridiculous holodeck program. Everyone was competent, and I don't think I've ever seen Janeway smile as much as she did here. I loved her interaction with Chakotay, and I liked how they worked together throughout the episode. Some of the dialogue was quite funny, especially Chakotay's comment about pulling a shuttlecraft out of a hat. I liked seeing Harry's concern about B'Elanna in Sickbay, and her subsequent comment about his spots was cute. Best of all in the character development area were the few moments of dialogue between Tom and Harry at the end. It's nice to see that they both try to emulate each other. Perhaps they bring out the best in one another. The jewel in the crown of all the scenes was seeing my favorite stuntwoman, Pat Tallman, knock down Harry with a staff and grapple with him on the floor. If I hadn't been watching for her, I probably would have missed her, but this scene was a lot of fun and the evil smile on her face was priceless. She looked almost as nasty as the time she zapped Bester with a psi bolt in Babylon 5. To summarize, "Favorite Son" had a totally inane premise which managed to be redeemed by some decent character work. It dragged in the scenes which took place on Taresia, but the rest of it was quite enjoyable. --Elizabeth Klisiewicz When The Powers That Be said they were going back to the good old days of classic Trek, I was happy. Silly me. I interpreted this as a good thing: you know, a resurgence of CREATIVITY (Oh!) and PLOT (Heavens!). Silly me. They meant a resurgence in TESTOSTERONE and Space-Babe Syndrome. They meant a resurgence in shameless pandering and moral/quality prostitution for the sake of the precious male teenage demographic. If you didn't catch the snippy sarcasm in that last, you must be duller than this episode, and if you are, you've accomplished a Herculean task. Speaking of Hercules, even that has more plot than "Favorite Son". This episode did not accomplish what I hoped it would. But as Trek has been teaching me, Hope is Futile. I hoped the episode would do two things, in case you wondered: 1) Restore my fading faith in Voyager. 2) Get rid of Harry. But after watching this episode, I'm still as depressed as ever, and Harry Kim is as persistent as that God-awful rash on his face (Note: Was B'Elanna so out of it that she couldn't think up a better nickname than Spot? C'MON!) In fact, I was so depressed that I looked FORWARD to DS9 -- "Let He Who is Without Sin" -- at least it had some HUMOR. But there were striking parallels nevertheless: the age and hormone level the two shows were trying to attract, as well as the perpetuation of the god-awful scantily-clad "all that we have is yours" crap which is multiplying faster than tribbles and is becoming more rampant than even in the Kirkian days of old. For the record, you advertising execs, I was not "siezed" or "teased" or anything involving the ending "-eezed," but I was bored out of my skull. But for characterization this couldn't be better; now Chakotay and Harry can bond over the babes they left behind. But if The Powers That Be start NOW to have continuity of this sort, I'll smile sweetly, phaser-remote in hand, and switch the set to Babylon 5. --Emily Friedman BEFORE AND AFTER It's hard for me to know how to feel about Ken Biller's writing. In some ways he's the most creative of the Voyager staffers; his episodes make new use of old concepts, like the Q continuum in "The Q and the Grey," the Borg in "Unity," and time-reversal here. His pacing is better than most of the Voyager and DS9 writers, and his dialogue tends to be sharp The flip side of this is that I often don't recognize his characters, or the universe he's writing in...and I don't much like the version I get in exchange. Take this episode. Biller made fabulous use of Jennifer Lien's formidable talents, and put a new spin on the old time-loop concept; considering that we saw something not that different less than two months ago in "Coda," it is a tribute to his skills that this show seemed so fresh and unique. But in order to create the scenario where poor Kes had to muddle through with the help of all the strong, sensitive men on the ship, he had to kill off the two women who of all the characters most exemplify strength and sensitivity...and he had to demonstrate that Voyager got along just fine without them. I'd feel a lot better about "Before and After," like "Unity" and "Maneuvers" before it, if I didn't feel like a deep thread of red-blooded misogyny informs the actions of all the female characters, and the male responses to them. I liked the idea of seeing an alternate future through Kes' eyes. But this future...I have to admit that, compelling as Lien's performance was, I got bored during the first 45 minutes. I missed Janeway and Torres, who are the main reasons I watch the show--I suppose that missing them was part of the point, but considering that this is the second time the writers have killed off Janeway in a little over a month, I found her death quite annoying. TNG "killed" Picard twice in seven years that I recall; Dead Janeway is already getting old. As for Torres...I guess it was necessary to knock her off so that Kes could have a familiar husband, and set up jokes about Tom being Harry's father-in-law, but the idea that Tom forgot fiery, brilliant B'Elanna in the arms of empathetic, caregiving Kes bugged me more than a little. Kes was resourceful in this episode, but mostly in relation to the men; it got a little wearing to hear her say, "I'm not sure, but I think it has something to do with [tech]" which the guys immediately interpreted for her. Chakotay looked reasonably competent in command, and I liked Tom and Kes' daughter, but this episode confirmed that I couldn't care less about a Voyager without Janeway. For that matter, I couldn't care less about a Trek franchise without a smart, strong, present Janeway, and I suspect a lot of other fans, male and female alike, feel the same way. The writers and the network would do well to note that. --Sara Unger I like the idea of someone travelling backward in time. But I think this episode didn't fully explore all the mental and social phenomena that would occur if someone were actually doing it. My first question is this: If Kes's "birth" actually occurred when she was nine years old, then why wasn't her mind a blank slate? How did she know how to talk? How could she classify and categorize images and words? It's not inconceivable to me that Kes was "born" as an old woman. It's just that if she didn't remember anything, she would require training--much like Uhura after Nomad wiped her memory. Now, the way I would have done it (I can never resist rewriting TV, so bear with me) is this: Kes would have remembered her past. She would remember it as she was getting younger. And this would raise some interesting possibilities. If you were to go back in time, knowing the tragic and maddening experiences you've lived through, would you try to change anything? This, I think, should have been the central question of the episode. I can foresee Kes, early on, having an argument with a philosophical soul like Chakotay. Kes is an old woman, and she has just figured out she is travelling back in time. She tells Chakotay. "I don't like it, but maybe I can prevent the worst things we've been through," she says. "Seska's betrayal. Hogan's death. The Caretaker's destruction. Captain Janeway and B'Elanna's death. The attacks of the Kazon." And on and on. Now, if you've ever been attacked by a codependent--and I have--you know how annoying it is. "Get out of my face" is the typical gut reaction. So I see poor little Kes getting her head bitten off, putting it back on, and shaking it in wonder that people weren't listening. She becomes subdued, then depressed. "What's the point?" she thinks. "Why should I go back in time when there's no good I can do there? Er, then?" So she tells the doctor to speed up his research. "I want to start over," she says. "I want to be three again, with a new philosophy of non-interference. Besides, I've got this cool new haircut I want to show off." As far as the other elements of the story--Tom and Kes getting married, Harry becoming their son-in-law (which was too funny), new attacks by new enemies--I didn't have a strong reaction. The details of Voyager's timeline were not as important to me as a central theme, or message. Unfortunately, it didn't seem to be there. My idea is not new. The TNG writers did it with "Tapestry," the TOS writers did it with "City on the Edge of Forever," and I'm sure there's some DS9 episode somewhere that addresses this theme. But it is a strong one, you see, because we all have regrets, and we all have to be reminded not to have them. If we didn't make mistakes, we wouldn't have a life, and if the Star Trek characters didn't make mistakes, we wouldn't have a series. Besides, by knowing the future, Chakotay and Janeway might never have caught an incurable disease, gone down to a planet and set up a life together. And to be bereft of all the discussion and fanfic and fantasy that episode has spawned -- well, that would be a life I just couldn't stand. --Jennifer Martin Watch out for the quiet ones: they sneak up from behind, grab you by the hair, and scream, "Pay attention to me, dammit!" From all accounts, Jennifer Lien appears to be such a person. Con reports say she's painfully shy in public and her fellow actors say that her head is always buried in a book. Whatever might be percolating behind that serene mask of hers appears to pour out in her dramatic performances. We first saw an inkling of her talent in the poorly scripted "Warlord" from earlier this season. "Before and After" is head and shoulders above that outing, and Jennifer shines in every scene here, along with Robert Duncan McNeill and Bob Picardo. Generally, superb talent is not enough to save a show when the writing is bad, but Ken Biller has given the actors some great material to play around with, and as a result, they've come up with a great episode. The supporting actors did a competent job and made the story believable. Despite some convoluted dialogue, there were still a lot of humorous lines, especially between Neelix and Tuvok. I try to ignore science, continuity and Treknobabble on Voyager, because if I focus on those elements, then I am ultimately disappointed. Instead, I'm trying to focus my attention on entertainment value and character work, because those are the things that bolster my faith in this show. "Before and After" starts out on Kes's deathbed and ends up in her mother's womb. The cause for this problem has to do with chronoton particles and some sort of high tech torpedoes capable of slicing through Voyager's shields like they're swiss cheese. Kes has been exposed to these particles and they've caused her to be out of temporal sync with her crewmates. I certainly don't understand how a future event could cause this to happen, but it makes for an intriguing mystery. As Kes jumps backward in time, we have no idea where she is going to end up next. I certainly didn't expect to see her on a shuttle giving birth to Tom's child. Janeway and Torres died quickly in a manner befitting faceless red shirts, and I was happy that this didn't happen for real. I'm also glad that the promos for this episode didn't use this as a ruse to lure hapless viewers in; the promo was right on target for a change. Biller also painted Chakotay as extremely competent in every command situation, and this pleased me, even though it was at the expense of Janeway dying! I have several questions, though: How did Kes' hair change so fast, and why did the Ocampan baby have human ears? I have to admit that the hair is a major improvement, especially after seeing that scene with Kes and Neelix in Janeway's office. Also, is it me, or was Neelix always so horribly patronizing toward Kes? Maybe they made him especially annoying so we will buy into the idea that their relationship was a bad idea from the start. And while the scenes between Tom and Kes were very good, they seemed more like buddies than life partners. Oh, and may I give a piece of advice to The Powers That Be? Get some sensible shoes for the female members of the cast. It looks pretty ridiculous to see someone crawling through a Jeffries tube with 4-inch heels. This had to have been an expensive episode to shoot. The special effects were great, especially the shot of Voyager with holes in its hull. I think this is the first time we've ever gotten to see the consequences of one of the ship's many battles. Biller has also given us a lot of meat to chew on. Are we going to see Voyager go through the Year of Hell, as Tom put it? Will we see this new alien threat? Will B'Elanna and Tom finally get together as they did in the holodeck scene? Will Neelix give up his cooking, thereby saving the stomachs of the Voyager crew but tormenting Tuvok forevermore? This is the kind of drama that keeps me coming back for more. --Elizabeth Klisiewicz The Doc has hair, Chakotay's captain, Harry is Tom's son-in-law, and Kes is aging backwards. Boy, am I glad I didn't walk in in the middle of this one. This wasn't a great episode, but it gave an interesting look at a possible future. It looks like the Tom-B'Elanna relationship's a go, and we may be seeing these Krenim characters at some point. Of course, now that Kes has warned Janeway about this new race, the rest of the episode's events are just part of a possible, and unlikely, future. Jennifer Lien gave another outstanding performance; she has managed to turn a potentially annoying character into someone of strength and depth, and for that she deserves high praise. Credit the writers, too, for giving her several interesting episodes, including this one, in which to explore her character's growth. I especially liked her interaction with Tom and the way she kept trying to solve her problem despite the constant time-jumping. She may only be 3 years old, but she's tougher and wiser than many of her older crewmates. I'm sure some people will complain that Chakotay didn't grieve sufficiently at Janeway's "death"--no wailing and gnashing of teeth this time--but it's important to take his behavior in context. This is a crisis situation, and he knows his responsibility is to the ship and crew. He can grieve later, as he acknowledges; right now, he has to do his job. The look of shock on his face when she dies speaks volumes, and I would have been disappointed if he had let his own feelings interfere with the task at hand. On a superficial note, I'm glad to see that Kes' elf hairstyle has been retired. The long hair looks better on her, and makes her look much more grown-up, which is probably the point. She's grown up a lot this season, and it will be fascinating to see what the future really holds for her. --Loey Lockerby If there is any one term which describes this third season, it's "inconsistent." Episodes have had a hit-and-miss quality to them. Some have been great, like "Future's End," "Sacred Ground," and "Remember"; others have been mediocre attempts like "False Profits," "Rise," and "Favorite Son." It's no fault of the actors, though; sometimes it just seems like the writers haven't quite gotten a handle on the characters, especially Kathryn Janeway. "Before and After" was a hit, and one of the better ones this year. I will admit, the promos didn't look too promising, but overall this was a good episode. There were no major holes in the plot and the characterizations were all fairly consistent. It began with Kes lying in Sickbay, unable to recognize her grandson, and had her flashing back to various points of her life. Each time, she learned more about what was going on and tried to stop the flashbacks. It reminded me of TNG's "Tapestry" in some ways, but like most things Trek, it took an old idea and gave it a new twist. Instead of Q saving Picard's life, Kes takes matters into her own hands and is instrumental in effecting her return to the Voyager she knows. The one thing that really bothered me was the lack of Janeway in this episode. The Powers That Be seem to be hell-bent on killing her off of late, which may not be a good harbinger of things to come. Some of the folks on the mailing list put it best: A Voyager without Janeway is not one I want to see. Ever. It's just not the same without her. The acting in this one was superb. Jennifer Lien deserves an Emmy nomination for this one. Kes came across with a grace and intensity not normally seen from her. The emotion beind the situation shone through like a beacon; I found myself genuinely caring about what happened. The other cast featured did an excellent job also. Robert Duncan McNeill showed a side of Tom Paris we haven't seen in a long time, and Chakotay's barely contained grief over Janeway's death was touching, as was Janeway's clearly maternal attitude toward Kes. If only the writers could produce material which allows Kate and company to shine more often... --Amy Spagna It's too bad that the Emmys tend to ignore science fiction except for technical awards. Following her impressive performance earlier this season in "Warlord," Jennifer Lien has proven once again that she is a young actress of depth and range. I found her acting fascinating in "Warlord" because she mirrored the attitude and speech of the actor who played the warlord with such power and authority. I found it subtle and understated in "Before and After" because she didn't take the easy route most actors would have of portraying her older self as a palsied senior citizen. Instead she expressed age by tiredness, by slowness of speech and stride. Even her eyes, drooping slightly closed, betrayed the weariness of age. As she "youthened" in each time jump, the alertness, the quickness, the swift turn of the head characteristic of the younger Kes came back. Given Voyager's near-weekly brushes with time travel, alternate dimensions and the bizarre, it seemed strange the crew didn't react to her time-travel pronouncements more quickly. Yet it's easy to understand from a human perspective. Since Kes failed to recognize her own family, any other statements she made would be treated with doubt. Those who have dealt with aged parents or grandparents whose minds are no longer what they were know that this stage can be very heartbreaking. Sometimes you try to reorient the person and sometimes you just have to go with the flow. The "Captain Chakotay" line near the beginning of the show hinted that something had happened to Janeway. And yes, I missed her. Yet Voyager functioned, because Janeway and Chakotay had truly managed to blend the crew into a whole where Chakotay's Maquis background was no longer an issue. He was competent and respected by the crew. He was also true to form in his tendency to trust Kes, once she was of an age where her memory could be trusted. It was interesting to see the mingling of human genes and Ocampan. While Kes' daughter didn't seem too affected, Andrew, who was one-quarter Ocampan, showed the cascading impact. Remember that Kes was fully grown and age 1 when she joined Voyager. Andrew was age 1, but just a boy. The continuity folks should be docked, though, for some inconsistencies in other areas. Kes' grown daughter had the characteristically pointed Ocampan ears, but as a newborn she had rounded ears. Likewise, the fetal Kes had pointed ears, but the newborn Kes had rounded ears. And Janeway's hair, in the scene where Neelix and Kes ask to stay aboard Voyager, was not the "bun of steel" from the "Caretaker" episode. Missing from the show was one scene I wish had been written, where Kes would have wistfully considered the future she'd lost, the daughter and grandson she'd lost, by helping Voyager fight this new race of aliens. But not to have aided Voyager would have meant losing many dear friends, including B'Elanna. During her time jumps Kes didn't have time to consider what she'd lost. But it would have been nice to see her reflect upon it at the end. --Donna Christenberry To say the least, I'm impressed. This is the kind of Trek I love: an excellent character story, and in this case, a glimpse of what might happen, or rather what won'thappen now that we've seen it. "Before and After" is also a relief from the sex-driven plots we've seen lately. Although this story is quite similar to TNG's "All Good Things...," the twist was great! Kes living her life backward gave me the feel of a "It's A Wonderful Life" in Star Trek style. This is a great reason for a strong character-driven story, and Kenneth Biller didn't fail in bringing out the potential. Jennifer Lien's acting was also a plus. She gave a convincing portrayal of each general time period Kes was in. From an old woman, to the Year of Hell, to present, each segment was well distinguished while still being 100% Kes. You rock, Ms. Lien! Any story that offers a glimpse into what the future could be is always a stimulant to the mind. The future seen here splits my opinion as far as likes and dislikes. The development of families was definitely neat. I naturally hope that Janeway and B'Elanna won't die, but no future is perfect. For all we know, their deaths were written in because there wasn't enough in the budget for a couple of red-shirt extras. Another comforting idea is that since Kes shared at least a couple of her future experiences with the crew, the future is already altered. Ah, an automatic invitation for more speculation! Good! That's what "Star Trek" is supposed to do, right? This was a very enjoyable episode, and a fun one. I don't miss the action and sex-based plots one bit. In fact, I'm thirsty for more character stories such as this one! --Charlynn Kate Smith REAL LIFE Wow. Not since DS9's "The Visitor" has a Trek episode actually moved me to tears. "Real Life" starts out very funny, as the Doctor creates a holographic family for himself that would make the Brady Bunch gag, then B'Elanna offers to make it more realistic (well, she never did get back at him for paralyzing her in "Darkling"). Meanwhile, the ship encounters a huge space tornado, so, naturally, Janeway wants to explore it (or, to paraphrase Neelix, "introduce her crew to the spectre of death at every turn," but I like that about her). Miraculously, these two plotlines end up having something to do with each other, and neither gets short-changed. That's almost reason enough to appreciate this episode. But there's more. As Doc tries helplessly to deal with his new, "improved" family, we see just how much real humanity he's developed over the past three years. The arrogance is still there, but so is a surprising amount of self-doubt, and a level of tenderness that we've only seen glimpses of before. This may be Robert Picardo's best performance to date, and the script gives him plenty to work with. Kudos also to the actors playing the Doctor's family; they may be holograms, but they're as real as he is. The last couple of scenes--the conversation in sickbay between the Doctor and Tom, and Doc's last, wrenching moments with his family--are why I love Star Trek over and above all other science fiction. It give us interesting characters and great drama, with a backdrop of science and exploration. Keep giving us episodes like this, and shelving drek like "Favorite Son", and I'll be glued to my TV every time. --Loey Lockerby "Real Life" epitomizes everything that is wrong with Voyager and much that is wrong with Trek. I can handle bad science fiction and soap-opera writing, but I am sick of being jerked around. Jeri Taylor's self-confessed alter ego has had most of her emotional interaction with phony men of one sort or another, and now Taylor has given us an episode which displays more grieving over a hologram than we have ever seen over a dead character--now that is an interesting contradiction, isn't it, a dead character? Can you kill something which only existed on tape in the first place? I wonder why I was less sad over Dead Phony Doc's kid than Dead Baby Wildman in "Deadlock," because it's pretty ridiculous to mourn either of them. It would be interesting if there were some serious commentary going on, like the notion that we should stop caring what happens to the fictitious Captain Janeway and look for some real role models. But what we seem to be seeing is the stunning contradiction wherein the writers apparently can't see the irony of creating a life for a character who's defined as artificial even among his TV series peers, yet are unable to give the supposedly "real" characters lives. "Real life" apparently means domestic life--we've gotten two straight weeks of that, first Kes's, now Doc's--but in both cases they were diversions, not the focus of the characters' ongoing roles. None of these characters has a life. The holodoc's consisted of soap opera-ish situations even after he stopped being Mike Brady, but the supposed "real" characters are even worse off--their having complicated relationships and emotions would represent a problem for series continuity, so unlike Doc who can at least reprogram his own family, they're stuck with what TPTB give them. Trek's writers are notoriously lazy, beginning and ending romances on a whim, creating and destroying hobbies and pets and sometimes children for the characters. 50-minute grand passions, like Picard's for Kamala, get a lot more attention than the passions one has to work at to maintain--the kind that require attention over the course of an entire life, or an entire television series' run. It figures that the one recurrent character on Voyager to get a family is the artificial man, and he gets the kind which can be deleted. Reminded me of Data with Lal on TNG's "The Offspring"--which was vastly better written, more emotional, and did not involve an annoying subplot which offered limited parallels as an excuse to hit the viewer over the head with The Moral. Poor Robbie McNeill: this is the third episode in which he's gotten the job of stating the obvious without any character growth. And why does Torres, who's supposed to be a strong Klingon despite being female, always have to be emotionally vulnerable, especially given that racism against her species is so pervasive the Doc will bar his son from associating with Klingons? I don't care much for Torres/ Paris--they're nowhere near as compelling as Janeway/Chakotay, the chemistry between Robbie and Roxann seems forced, and the contrived interaction is dulling both characters, especially B'Elanna--has she had a single scene in which she was defined as an engineer, a hoverball player, anything other than Paris' girlfriend, since "Blood Fever"? But this is the first Trek relationship this generation to go more than three consecutive episodes, so I am not going to complain. I'm not sure I can bear to talk about the sexist assumptions of Trek's future that went into the construction of Doc's initial wife, "the little woman," Kathie Lee Gifford--someone give the casting director an Emmy for finding her, though. Given that Picard married a similar Real Woman in the Nexus in Generations and Janeway had a similar mother in Mosaic--you know, the stay-at-home, support-the-man, make-the-family-work variety--there must be more women who've been taught to be self-effacing and blindly cheerful in the future than there are now. And even Torres reads romance novels--arrgh. I'd have picked Chakotay as a more likely candidate to do so. Considering that it has a female captain, Voyager is probably the most sexist Trek show we've had yet, Kirk's babealicious Enterprise included. Fluff chick Kes and braided B'Elanna aren't really the problem. It's the display we get, over and over, that a woman may either be a leader or a wife/mother/lover/total human being, but not both. I'm surprised Janeway (who looked like the stupidest woman and starship captain alive this week, sticking around for cheerful scientific investigation of a phenomenon that destroyed a space station) hasn't created herself a holo-Mark and some holo-kids for her off-hours. Then she could continue to run around with a phaser rifle the rest of the time without the risk of real emotions interfering. (Chak can find some other long-haired warrior princess to get a life--I mean, make a life--with, though now that tomcat Tommy is practically tied down with a proverbial ball and chain, he might have to take over as Ship's Stud even if he's too old to get away with it.) Too bad Janeway didn't know about the Doc's experiment; she could have offered him advice about holokids, given her own proclivities. It would also be nice if she paid attention to what her EMH is wasting her ship's energy on, but the current incarnation of Janeway doesn't seem involved in her crew's emotional life unless it's at her own funeral. For all my complaints about this century, we're better off than Kathryn and her crew of cardboard stand-ups. --Sara Unger "It's the story, of a Holodoc with no name. Who was busy creating a family of his own. They were 4 'grams, living all together, but they were all overdone." Before I get into reviewing the rest of the episode, first, a monumental event. For the first time ever a couple of grammatically correct, and correctly pronounced, tlhIngan-Hol phrases have been uttered in a Star Trek television show! When I heard, "qay'be'," I jumped up and yelled at the TV, "I know that! That's 'No problemo'!" They even pronounced "petaQ" correctly. But then my euphoria was shattered by the mangling of "qutluch" (or kutluch in English). Hint: The Klingon "u" is never pronounced "uh" it's always "oo." But still, it was nice to see a Trek writer using the grammar section of The Klingon Dictionary, instead of just picking random words. (Or even worse, completely making something up.) As to the rest of the show... Well, how can I put this... It was written by Mary Sue and directed by Potsie. I unfortunately saw the last 5 minutes first, so I knew what was going to happen. It gave me a kind of detached feeling. When I saw that trio tromping down the stairs, I thought I had accidentally taped a Brady Bunch rerun. And that's my biggest problem with the episode, the title is wrong. It wasn't real life, it was play acting. All except for Picardo. He really tried. But the cardboard cutouts pantomiming around him ruined it for me. (Oh, and the bad wigs didn't help. What happened? Did a case of AquaNet explode in the wig dept.?) This episode finally hammered something home for me. I've been in favor of a B'Elanna/Tom relationship. It reads so well on paper. The dialog, as written, should have been a wonderfully flirtatious scene in the mess hall. But it wasn't. There is absolutely no chemistry on screen between Robbie and Roxann. I mean even Neelix & Kes had more chemistry. And that's a real shame. So overall, I think the idea of the show was good. But the execution just left me flat. --Rachel Wyman This episode takes the "Trek can't depict real relationships" problem to new and interesting heights. Part of the problem, of course, is that most of real family life is much too banal to show on television--at any rate, as the main story of a drama. The Doctor's crash course in famiy life turns out to be six episodes, all occurring essentially in three days. A television series which follows the lives of a group of characters over a number of years can, theoretically, depict evolving relationships, but there hasn't been enough continuous attention to this on Voyager (particularly in the rather central relationship between Janeway and Chakotay, which can change quite radically from week to week with no visible explanation). Doing one episode focusing on the life of a holographic family doesn't solve that problem. The Doctor's family life winds up consisting mostly of his discovery that his son would rather be a Klingon and his daughter's death. The former story is a rather interesting 24th-century twist on a familiar problem. It's unfortunate that we don't really see the Doctor confronting the questions of what his human values are and what the limits of his tolerance are. The death of the girl, on the other hand, seems rather contrived--such occurrences are rare in families which have full access to late-twentieth-century medical technology, so it would seem even less likely in a holoprogram designed to give a realistic depiction of 24th-century family life. Additionally, the fact that she's a hologram means her death isn't real and irreversible--Torres could just make a few adjustments to the program. In other words, we're dealing with blatant audience manipulation here. I'm not saying it isn't effective audience manipulation--I cried even the third time I saw it. Picardo is a very talented actor, and it's good when he gets a chance to go beyond making wisecracks. It's still a cheap trick, though. The B story involves Voyager entering an area of space where eddies of technobabble are swirling up from a special-effects layer. Its principal merits are allowing Janeway a little scientist time and giving Kim the memorable line, "Captain, this is one weird disturbance." The flirtation scene between Torres and Paris, which is part of an effort to show a relationship changing over time, doesn't work well, unfortunately, because there's another little episode of possession by aliens going on. In view of what we know about Torres's personality and her relationship with her mother, Klingon romance novels (in English translation, if Tom can read it without changing the display) are not high on the list of plausible reading materials for her. Like Janeway's holodeck program, this smells a little too much like needing to show that she's a "real woman." If this were a fifties movie, she'd be taking off her glasses and Paris would be suddenly realizing how beautiful she is. Paris's defenses are down way too low, too. Everybody involved in this scene needs to get some flirting practice. The pairing of the Doctor's holofamily adventures with the constant reminders that the crew of Voyager are like a family (which become cloying well before Paris's actual speech--which could have been delivered by anybody who happened to be in Sickbay at the time) makes for a really obvious analogy--if Voyager is like a family, and families where everyone gets along perfectly are unbelievable, then perhaps we need a little more conflict on Voyager. The next episodes will show whether this was an intentional signal or not. --Jennifer Loehlin The season is coming to a close, sweeps month is almost here, and what do they throw at us? A cheap knockoff of Father Knows Best crossed with Twister. I care about these characters, and I care about the actors who play them. So when the writers waste the talent they've been given, I feel a sense of loss. Bob Picardo is possibly the most talented thespian in the Voyager troupe, but not even he could save this poor excuse of an episode. I'll admit that Doc's initial program was faintly amusing, but only after recovering from gut-wrenching nausea after those gummy sentiments. B'Elanna's comments about her blood sugar were right on target, but it was all downhill from there. The Paris/Torres interchange held no real heat, and I nearly puked when Torres admitted she read Klingon romance novels for fun. And why did they change her hair? The braid is OK, but what's the point? I'm also growing real tired of the jokes about Neelix's cooking. It was bad enough to hear it once in an episode, but no, we had to hear it several times. As for the red-shirt officer at the conn, first he gets pushed aside by Paris, then later by Chakotay. If I were that guy, I'd be mad. Couldn't we at least have a name to go with the red shirt? Oh, yeah, that's right, if they spent any real time developing a character and giving him a name, then he'll be dead by the end of the season. On to the A story, such as it is. Doc is trying to learn about the human condition, so he creates a sickeningly perfect holofamily for himself. After meeting these constructs, Torres changes them into something that approaches a real family. By the end of this episode, Doc's daughter Belle, played by the snippy brat from "Persistence of Vision" [Lindsey Haun], is blinded and dies. Was it really necessary to burden an already weak storyline with this melodrama? Wasn't it enough that his daughter went blind? I know that Jeri Taylor has good intentions, and I'm glad she's willing to take chances, but the risks aren't paying off. She doesn't have the writing staff to pull this off, and that's unfortunate. The B story was pointless filler that was totally unrelated to the A story and reminded me of "The Swarm." The anomaly of the week destroys a space station of friendly scientists with whom Voyager planned to rendezvous. Rather than going about their business, which is what any sensible crew without backup would do, they decide to investigate. First, they send in a probe and it gets sucked into an eddy. Could this phenomenon possibly be--dangerous? Nah, that's too easy. So, after ignoring what happened to the station and the probe, they decide to send in one of their endless supply of shuttles. And just to make this all sound oh-so-important, they try to impress us with mindless technobabble about Bussard collectors. Come on, we all know what’s going to happen. Tommy Boy goes out to play, gets sucked in, and we're all treated to some pretty colored lights swirling across our screen. By the way, that was the only part of this whole storyline I could tolerate--the special effects. Too bad they were wasted on such a lame episode. Anson Williams directed this mess, and if I were him, I wouldn't brag about it. There was nothing remarkable about his camera work, except for some extreme closeups of Robbie McNeill that cut off the top of his head and made him look bald. In summary, a totally disappointing episode with no redeeming qualities. --Elizabeth Klisiewicz I'll give it to you up front: I adored this episode. I would rank this as one of my favorite Voyager episodes, and even rank it among the best of Trek. In classic Trek fashion, technology was used as a device to force us to look at our everyday relationships in a different way. We ask ourselves: What if I could choose my family? Or shut down the "program" when things got rough? On a more basic level, it makes us to wonder: What if I could avoid pain in my life? Would I? Should I? Is that a life worth living? Enough to ponder for a lifetime. I was also very pleased to see some character development (gasp!), not only for the Doctor, (as usual, Picardo did an outstanding job here), but also for Tom in particular. When I started watching this show, I pegged him for the pretty boy smart aleck, and immediately disliked him. I was wrong to do so. We have watched him grow steadily throughout the seasons, and I have become very attatched to his character. I am continually impressed at his ability to grow, adapt, and change. McNeill is to be comended, as are the writers who provide the continuity in his character. The action-based "B" plot did not really seem to fit anywhere. This is unfortunate, because it was a good story that would have meshed better with another "A" plot. But in this case, much like in The Swarm, the incredible emotional impact of the Doctor's story was overwhelming. While issues of family, loss and grief are compelling, I realized that there was something wrong with caring more about a holographic child than a real Tom Paris. This episode really hit home with me. Most of us have had our share of hard times with our families, and would be tempted to delete, undo, or stop the "program" given the opportunity. But, speaking from personal experience, it is not just a nice cliche to say that difficulty and strife bring a family together. I wouldn't give up any of the pain and hardship I've been through for all the world, and when pressed, neither would many other people I know. It is rare that television moves me not only to tears, but to outright sobs. This episode did. But more importantly, it made me think. And above all, that is my criterion for a good story. --Kristin Fiebelkorn "Real Life," featuring Robert Picardo as the holographic family man, in my opinion, was a unique Voyager episode in which the holographic Doctor not only discovered his desire to be a family man, he experienced both extremes of what family living was all about. On the one extreme, the doctor had created the perfect holographic wife and two extremely well-behaved, well-mannered, overachieving children, whose goal it was to bestow their honor on their holographic parents and to make them proud by their high level of academic success at school. The Doc's was the only family I know of, besides the Cleaver household, in which the family lined up at the front door to see Dad off to work in the morning, bestowing upon him their sincerest blessings for a successful, gratifying day at work. Yes, Kenneth and his wife, Charlene, were truly the 24th century version of the Cleavers. Charlene, a typical June, remained at home to look after the household and two children who didn't seem to require parental supervision. And typical of the Cleaver offspring, the children always seemed to be doing the right things, which is more than enough to make any parent proud and carefree. The holographic Doctor, on the other hand, had obviously no concept of the difference between the fantasy he was living and the real element of spontaneous, emotional family living. A fault of the Doctor? No. He was merely a computer-generated image, thus, reality was totally out of his realm of comprehension. B'Elanna convinced him there was more to living than an existence which had been designed to react to pre-programmed stimuli. Accepting what B'Elanna said as true, the Doc consented to a change in this holographic family, confident that he had everything under control, and that not much would be different. It wasn't until he returned home from work that night that the Doc realized real spontaneity was not necessarily obedience in the same terms as he understood obedience and order within his family. Reality is not the Doc's strong point. The loss of control he experienced led to a frustrated husband and father. For example, when Kenneth arrived home from work, his son, in terms of reality, bore more resemblance to a Bud Bundy who would not accept responsibility for himself. He slept until noon, he must have skipped school. He possessed a rebellious attitude to his dad's authority, but was sheltered by his mother from having to deal with his dad regarding his sloppy outlook on life and his choice of friends. The authoritative stand the Doctor took in the interest of restoring his family to the level of order where he had last left them was not acceptable to them, causing a division between both parents and children over corrective measures Dad had devised for their good. His daughter, although merely a holographic image, felt for her dad, knowing what he attempted to achieve at the family meeting. Unlike the rest of the family, she did not leave him out in the cold. She acknowledged his good intentions in a form of spontaneous love for her dad. But, like in every family, tragedy struck the holographic household. The daughter was injured. Holographic though his family was, the Doctor shut down the program, ending what would have been, in his estimation, a tragic situation he could no longer deal with. And because of the sensitive emotional stimuli within the interaction of real family life programmed by B'Elanna, he now faced a decision: whether or not to complete what was started. The Doctor, aboard Voyager, was able to perform many a medical miracle. He was almost able to raise the dead through his extensive knowledge of medicine, genetics, and the equipment available to him in sickbay. But between himself and another surgeon, he was unable to save his own daughter from hemorrhaging. The question here is, what happened to the Doctor who was able to work medical wonders for others that he was unable to reverse the damage done in his daughter by her accident? Was it because he did receive what he wanted? A real life family in the true sense? Choosing to continue to gain the closure he needed for his emotional well-being in the future, the Doctor ran the program from where it left off in the hospital room. The question that remains unanswered from the standpoint of his holographic nature is: Did he feel inside what the expression on his face revealed on the outside? In my opinion, I see two ways in which this episode can be viewed. The first is the supposition the characters were nothing more than holographic images, and likewise, the entire storyline had gone astray through an emotional valley completely foreign to holograph images. Or, this episode can be viewed as a reminder that through tragedy comes the birth of unity with those with whom we share some form of a relationship. --John Hogg DISTANT ORIGIN I thought this episode was great. I don't mean that I loved it like "The Cloud" and "Deadlock," which were mediocre science fiction with great character development; I mean, I loved it the way I loved Classic Trek, where Kirk pontificated in all his glory while Spock spouted plausible-sounding scientific explanations for aliens with cheesy makeup and big, silly technical devices. "Distant Origin" was a fine successor to episodes like "Bread and Circuses" and "Return to Tomorrow." Where but Trek could we get Galileo and dinosaur duplicates in one place? This show did several things right. The first was the distant origin of the story: we didn't see a familiar face, not counting poor Hogan's skull, for the first quarter. I liked seeing the humans as the aliens, especially since the point was that we're all similar at the genetic level anyway. The Voth leader was superlative--talked like T'Pau of Vulcan, thought like an Inquisitor--and the combination of religious fanaticism and political agenda she spouted, resonating with everything from Moral Majority narrow-mindedness to Klan racial ideology to U.S. manifest destiny policies, was wonderfully evocative. I thought Chakotay's speech to her about her people's true heritage of glory was long winded, but very Kirkian; perhaps if he had over-acted it in Shatner style, it would even have convinced the aliens of the errors of their ways as Kirk always did. I'm sure there are people with the scientific background to criticize the dinosaur descent theories, and one might wish there had been something resembling character development. (Paris and Torres playing already-tiresome Klingon mating games doesn't count; Tom got to be a hero, but will we ever see B'Elanna be something other than his girlfriend again?) Nonetheless, I have no real complaints. This was a thoroughly enjoyable hour of TV, which did not trash characters in the name of action as "Unity" did, and which offered enough of a plea for tolerance and open-mindedness that I wasn't sorry I watched Voyager instead of Ellen's coming-out party. --Sara Unger I watched Ellen, I taped Voyager, then I watched Voyager. Ellen made me laugh and made me cry and made me feel proud to be queer. Voyager made me seethe and snarl and be ashamed that Trek calls itself science fiction. When I was four years old, I went to the Smithsonian and saw the dinosaur skeletons. From that point on, my childhood dream was to become a paleontologist. I read voraciously, wrote papers, even I got into special a college class on the subject when I was only in junior high. Finally, I realized that it wasn't the career for me, but I still studied paleontology, evolution, geology, and physical anthropology in college. The study of our planet's fossil record is a passion for me--some would put it on par with a religion. That's why episodes like this anger me so much. They're heresy, pure and simple. This contained so many scientific errors that I couldn't see beyond them to the plot. I should have known when I saw Brannon Braga in the writing credits that this episode would be like this. Here are the major scientific inaccuracies that are making my blood boil: 1. Cold blooded saurians--am I the only one to read Robert Bakker? There's a lot of debate on whether dinosaurs were warm blooded or just mass homeotherms, but not many people believe they were all cold blooded. There's a helluva lot of evidence against that old theory. Didn't Braga see Jurassic Park?!? They quoted Bob Bakker and other warm blooded theorists, so it's not like awareness of this issue hasn't reached pop culture yet. Never mind the fact that it was intimated that all warm bloods are mammals. Anyone heard of birds? And don'tforget, current theory extrapolates that birds evolved from dinosaurs--another link in the warm blooded fence. 2. Extrapolating evolution--I ranted about this when "Threshold" aired, and I'll do it again. Evolution occurs when randomly occurring mutations take root in a breeding population and then spread (or are weeded out) through natural selection. You can't extrapolate where a species will go with any accuracy. Lab tests have proven this. That test in the holodeck just doesn't cut it. 3. No fossil evidence--I just don't believe that a space-faring race could evolve and not leave any fossil or anthropological evidence behind. Nope. Not buying it. I don't care if the area they evolved in was hit by a flurry of meteors or has since become part of a tectonic subduction zone. Nope. I don't care how cheaply you're selling it, because I'm not buying. Sigh. Must think happy thoughts of Ellen. Must think of her beautiful smile. Must think of her and Laura Dern together. Sigh... Much better. --Jennifer Pelland (Siubhan) Let's get the nitpicks out of the way first, shall we? Paramount should fire the people who do their promos--they're doing them a disservice. When I saw the previews for "Distant Origin," my husband commented that the only dinosaurs reside on the Voyager writing staff. I mean, this really looked bad, and if I was a casual viewer, I would be instantly turned off. What is wrong with a realistic preview? It's been pointed out that the science in "Distant Origin" is weak, but I'm not a paleontologist, so I wouldn't know one dino bone from another and I cannot comment on evolution. My only other nit with this episode was something Chakotay said during his impassioned defense of Gagin. He mentioned something about Gagin's ancestors leaving Earth in space ships. His theory was that they evolved on some lost continent. Are we talking Atlantis here? I don't know, but this seemed silly to me. I think it would have been neat if some aliens removed this first race from Earth and deposited them elsewhere in the galaxy. Perhaps a few of these ancestors knew the truth about their origins, but they kept it hidden from the rest of their race. Time passed, and they evolved. Later, Gagin discovers their secret, and threatens to expose them to the Voth culture. To me, that would have been more compelling than the explanation that was given. With all this aside, let me say that I enjoyed this episode immensely. I think it's the best episode of Season 3, not that there's been much competition. The contrast between last week's "Real Life" and this week's episode could not be more great. I really thought I was watching a different show. These are the most interesting aliens yet encountered on Voyager, and we only get them for one episode. Why were the dull and boring Kazon thrust at us for two seasons, but we only get the Voth once? My theory is that Voyager must have decided to take a right turn at the Nechrid Expanse instead of going in circles. Presenting the episode from the Voth point of view seemed unique, and I really appreciated the change. They say there is nothing new in Trek, so this has probably been done before, but if it has, I am not aware of it. The alien makeup was extremely effective, and the actors playing Gagin and the female elder did a great job. The elder was especially menacing, due in no small part to her imperious bearing and the low, throbbing tones of her voice. I suspect that this actress has done a lot of theatre, and it shows. Robert Beltran's Shakespearean background was also quite evident, and this was easily one of his best performances in the entire three years of Voyager's run. Good actors can rise above bad material, and Beltran has accomplished this feat on many occasions, but when he's handed some really good scenes, he's superb. David Livingston directed this episode, and his unusual closeups and camera angles were especially striking. I liked the long shots of the bridge and Janeway and the EMH on the holodeck. I also liked the way he framed the female elder from down below while she was speaking. It really gave you the feeling that she was about to trounce on you, and when he reversed the angle so that he was looking down on Gagin and Chakotay from the elder's standpoint on the dais, that was really effective. Humorous dialogue was sprinkled throughout "Distant Origin." Chakotay's line about harpooning the local wildlife is destined for the Trek Hall of Fame, and the sight gag with Gagin's tongue snatching the bug out of mid-air was especially funny. I have to admit, there are times when Brannon Braga's sick sense of humor is put to good use! Another minor miracle was seeing the Voyager crew outclassed by these aliens in every sense of the word. Voyager is swallowed whole by the city ship, and what a ship it was. The sets used were dark, gritty and extremely imposing. When the city ship came into the picture and they showed its underbelly, it reminded me of footage from Star Wars and the Imperial destroyers. And then Janeway goes into her 'Girl with the Gun' mode and grabs one of those big, honking compression phaser rifles she loves to tote around. Livingston used a cool closeup of Kathryn and her gun, and then when she tries to use it, all she gets is a useless clicking sound. I also liked the Voth's native tongue, but it made me wonder about something. Why did the universal translators only work occasionally? Both in Sickbay, and when the Voth first board Voyager, we hear their native clicking. Is this supposed to be something other than them talking, or is it a breakdown of the universal translation matrix? Finally, these aliens considered the Human mammals to be inferior, and had absolutely no interest in being friends. Even though the elder recognized the truth when she heard it, her xenophobia and love of power kept her fixed in her decisions. That was true to life, and I was glad that they didn't decide to have a happy ending with the mammals and dinosaurs all joining hands and being one big happy family. Yet another pleasant surprise was the continuity from "Basics II" and "Fair Trade." I liked seeing Gagin and Vir put the pieces together and track down our crew. To wrap things up, "Distant Origin" was a rather simple tale, and that's why it worked so well. Although the science wasn't there, we have to remember that this is Trek! The dialogue was mostly free of technobabble, and it was strongly reminiscent of famous events in Earth's history. Gagin was no different from scientists like Galileo or Copernicus, who were ostracized for their beliefs. I think this story was something we can all relate to, and I'd like to believe that the story lines will continue to be this compelling. --Elizabeth Klisiewicz "Distant Origin," surprisingly enough, is a remarkable episode where Trek writing is concerned. Partially. From a scientific aspect, the Psychic Friends Network is to real facts as this episode is to scientific plausibility. One of the things we Trekkers often complain about is that Voyager isn't staying true to the ideals of the series from which it is based. "Distant Origin" cannot give us any complaints as far as morality in a story is concerned. Here we have an alien race that is being faced with a completely shocking proposal that society would surely be afraid to accept. The original "Star Trek" series did this with several aspects of humanity every week, so perhaps an analogy is automatically made between this story and "Star Trek's" past, but with different outcomes. Professor Gegin is very similar to a figure from our past: Galileo. I noticed the relation almost immediately. Both made discoveries that society was afraid to even think about accepting, and both paid for staying consistent in their beliefs, despite the fact that the odds were against them. Both had daughters and student companions as well. Now, I'm the furthest thing from a well-rounded and informed scientist, so I could be very wrong with what's said in this paragraph. It is my opinion that all humanoid species must have some genetic coding similar to have the basic humanoid form, but thatdoesn't mean that they all evolved from Earth. I think that the incredible amount of common genetic coding could only be an indication that the planets where these people evolved from have similar properties. It has been proven that very strict conditions must exist on a planet before life can exist. To me, this seems like a much more plausible theory than the one given. How could dinosaurs evolving on Atlantis create space-worth technology and end up in the Delta Quadrant? Even in the time between the existence of dinosaurs and humans, I don't know how a species could evolve enough and gain enough knowledge for space travel. Also, how did this species survive a natural disaster that we believe killed everything but smaller animals worldwide? If this race of people is so related to us, surely they have similar thought patterns. Wouldn't we find evidence of them exploring the continents that were just separating? Surely, they wouldn't have stayed in one place. What about pollution? I have many questions. I did enjoy Gegin's quest of proving his theories, but for one of the few times of my life, I'll actually agree with a society. The theory that dinosaurs continued to exist and evolve after a worldwide disaster just isn't possible. --Charlynn Kate Smith VOYAGER #12: CHRYSALIS By David Niall Wilson The latest entry in the Voyager series is a major yawn, which quite coincidentally is the theme of this novel. Voyager, in an eternal search for food, goes into an orbit around a planet covered heavily with lush gardens. (Oh, did I mention that this is very close to the theme of the last book, too?) The planet is populated with aliens whose name resembles the human urinary tract. (Dare I say that this book belongs in the toilet too?) Too bad, because David Wilson did a fair job with the characters and actually seems to have watched some Voyager episodes beyond the pilot. Gasp! Imagine taking the time to view the show so you can breathe a little life into the characters! This is more than I can say for the storyline, which drags from beginning to end. We are force-fed the alien lifestyle, The Big Sleep, which is irony in itself--if you have insomnia, then this book is a sure cure for what ails you. I had so much trouble following the story that I had to re-read sections to make sure it was really as plodding and pointless as it first appeared. After the aliens go through this long sleeping phase of their life, they all rise up into heaven during The Awakening, which is what you gentle readers will be doing once you finish this book. That is, if you finish this book. The dialogue had a few funny moments, especially when someone was hailing the ship from the ground or was using intership communications. For example, when Tom Paris hailed the bridge, he said, "Bridge, Paris." instead of "Paris to Bridge." I also laughed when Torres called Chakotay "Sir." In all three seasons, I've never heard Torres call her friend "Sir." The aliens were nondescript creatures who drifted in and out of ancient structures in the jungle. The Voyager crew did the same thing as they wandered aimlessly inside the alien caverns. And I did the same thing as I meandered from one stifling passage to another. One final note: this book has the ugliest cover art ever. --Elizabeth Klisiewicz *COPYRIGHT VIOLATION CORNER* Disclaimer: Paramount owns everything except Sue's mind, which she claims they would not want anyway. SEPARATE BUT EQUAL by Sue Love When the Maquis joined Voyager's crew, they elected to have a slightly different rank designator than the Starfleet crew members, a bar of pips rather than single pips. This allowed them to maintain a distinction from the Starfleet crew, and they have remained separate but equal ever since. Chakotay looked up from his desk as the door to his quarters slid open. Tom Paris stood in the doorway. "Catch," Paris called, tossing a padd across the room. "Last shift helm log for your approval. I added those notes you wanted at the end. I'm supposed to wait for it. The Captain wants to close out the shift." Chakotay caught the padd neatly. "Thanks. Give me a minute to recheck it." "No problem." As Chakotay scrolled through the listings, Paris leaned against the door frame, idly looking around the room. He hadn't been in Chakotay's quarters more than few times. They were larger than his own--most of that space taken up by the work station that dominated one wall of the room, which was presently covered with neat stacks of padds. First Officer wasn't a job he wanted, Paris realized. Not at this point anyway. He knew for a fact that Chakotay worked long hours, and Paris enjoyed his time off too much to give it up. He also knew that this particular First Officer took a lot of flak from the crew--at least, he had in the beginning. Paris wasn't interested in that, either. "Here you go," Chakotay told him, affixing his authorization and tossing the padd back to Paris. "I appreciate you making the changes." "No problem. Getting any business?" Paris wondered, as he turned to leave. "Enough." Paris shrugged. To each his own. He neatly turned out of the room, allowing the door to slid closed. On duty, but working on a series of efficiency reports, Chakotay was practicing what Janeway approvingly referred to as his 'open door' policy. Part of his job as First Officer was to handle crew complaints and problems, and he found that spending one afternoon a week off the bridge made it easier for those easily awed by command to bypass the ready room for the more casual atmosphere of his quarters. He generally wore off-duty clothes and kept a pot of tea or pitcher of juice handy, along with an open mind and ear. Most of the complaints were minor now--arguments with roommates, issues with the duty roster, pre-emptive efforts to control holodeck scheduling--seldom more than could be resolved over mugs of the spicy tea. It had not been so easy in the beginning--when he and Janeway had agreed to merge their crews, mend their differences and get about the business of surviving and going home. He had been forced to defend himself--and Janeway, an awkward position for one so recently an enemy. The words "traitor" and "coward" had been hurled at him not a few times by his Maquis crew, and not a few times had he wondered if they fit. Doing what he believed was right for his people had meant returning to a uniform that did not wear well at first. It was a little stiff, the colors too harsh and unyielding, the design too polished. But it fit well enough now--after a couple years of wear and tear. There were those among Janeway's people who resented his commission, and his orders--once, enough to threaten him. But that had changed, too, and now there was comfort, if not camaraderie. It had been difficult in those early days to control his temper, to remember to consider the situation, to wear the new insignia of rank, to serve someone other than himself. He had managed, though; proven himself adaptable. He was nothing if not a survivor. He had established himself with the crew and their Captain, learned which things to take to her. Which she preferred him to handle. She could do her own dirty work, and did. He just ran interference. It was the main job of the second-in-command--to make the Captain's life easier, to keep her a bit removed from the flotsam and jetsam that crowed mainstream life on the ship. He had big shoulders. He didn't mind the job as long as the respect was there...and it was. Janeway, who had been slow to support him, slower to trust him, had learned she could count on him to keep the ship running smoothly, to back her orders, to give thoughtful counsel. They made a good team, balanced each other well, and the combined crews had flourished under their unique leadership. And if the Maquis still had a tendency to do things without formality, to rebel a bit against protocol, to take the led and react rather than obey--things were going in the right direction. The two groups were merging, not separating. The Maquis still met informally as a group. There was a tactical simulation program one of them had set up in the holodeck and it ran a night or two a week. Chakotay visited occasionally; ran the simulation to keep in practice, stayed afterward to talk. It was a way to keep contact with his Maquis crew, to maintain his identity as their leader and keep an ear to their issues and problems. He wondered why that was so important--to him--to them--but it seemed to be, and as it didn't interfere with his loyalties to Voyager or Janeway, there was no reason to discontinue it. She knew all about it, of course--from him, and from the beginning. He hadn't asked her permission, just advised her. "I don't like private clubs," she had replied. "But I understand the need for transition. I have no problem with it as long as it's open to any crew member on Voyager." And it was, though frankly, Sandrine's and the resort were more popular with Starfleet and Maquis alike. Off time was off time no matter one's allegiance, and the entertainment venues were simply more fun. Chakotay pushed away from his desk. He had five or six more hours to go on the efficiency reports, but his office hours were over and his stomach was growling. He'd skipped lunch to crawl through a Jeffries tube with B'Elanna and check her newest improvement to the engines. Her alterations were impressive, but hadn't done much to relieve his hunger. He logged off the duty roster and crossed the room, activating the doorslide. "Janeway to Chakotay." Janeway's distinctive voice rang out on the comm. He paused to reply. "Chakotay here." "Have you eaten, Commander?" "I was just about to." "I'd like you to join me in my quarters. I have something to discuss with you. I'll buy you dinner. " "Are you cooking?" he teased. He couldn't resist. He heard her throaty laugh in response, soft, subtle. "I'll ignore that bit of insubordination, Commander," she said dryly. Chakotay grinned. "I'm on my way." Janeway was still in uniform when he arrived, pulling two plates off the tray Kes had left. "Come in, Commander," she greeted him. "I suggest we eat first. Neelix just prepared this." Chakotay took his plate and utensils and followed her into the sitting area. There were a couch and low table before the observation window. She led him there. "Please, sit," she gestured with her plate. "Thank you for updating that helm report," she stirred the stew that Neelix had assured her was quite delectable. "I had intended to ask Mr. Paris to add his observations." He tentatively poked his fork through the stew in search of something recognizable. "I'm sorry I missed it," he apologized. "You miss very little," she said dismissively. And it was true. He was nothing if not thorough. Little happened on the ship that he was not aware of. She had no complaints about his dedication or his command style--it was open and inclusive. In fact, she had approved wholeheartedly when he'd come forward with his idea for off-bridge time. "How were you open hours today?" "Mostly climatalogical," he grinned. "In other words, it's too cold in my quarters, make my roommate turn up environmental," she said, shaking her head. "You'd think after two years, those kinds of thing would be worked out." "We've worked out a lot," he reminded her. "If this is all that's left, I can deal with it." "You've been instrumental in that, Chakotay," she said. "In integrating these crews." "It was either that or spend the next 70 years in the brig," he teased. "So you decided I was the lesser of the two evils?" she rejoined. "Something like that...or I guess I could have taken over your ship." He was deliberately baiting her, and she knew it. "Why do you think I gave you the field commission to full Commander?" she asked dryly "So you bought me." "That would imply ownership." "Some would argue that Starfleet owns us." He was now serious. "We wear their colors, their mark." He reached over and traced the line of pips on her collar. "Didn't you wear rank insignias in the Maquis?" He shook his head. "No. Leaders make good targets." "I suppose that's true. We're so distanced from hand to hand combat on a starship. Those issues don't come up." Janeway stood and collected their plates. "Tea?" "Please." He followed her to the counter, found the cups and poured the tea from the thermos Kes had left, while Janeway dealt with the dishes and recycler. "So how did it feel to put the rank insignia on again?" she asked thoughtfully, accepting the tea mug and following him back to the couch. "It went with the uniform." "And when you put that uniform back on...?" "Did I suddenly feel like a Starfleet officer again? Did it erase my years in the Maquis?" He shook his head. "No. Actually it felt damned uncomfortable." "Tell me." She curled her legs up, shifting to face him on the couch. She had given him Cavit's quarters. There was little choice. The losses among Voyager's crew had been replaced by Maquis. Chakotay stepped up to the door and keyed in the code Janeway had given him. The door activated and he walked in. The lights automatically brightened. "Lights down a level," he directed. He stood there near the door and glanced around to get his bearings. It was bigger than anything he'd called quarters since his days teaching tactical at Starfleet. Then he'd had an apartment--a one bedroom arrangement with a balcony. He used it mostly for sleeping--most of his time was spent at the training facility. This place would be different. These quarters would be home for 70 years--or could be. He would take Cavit's place here just as on the bridge at Janeway's side. He stepped further in. Cavit's personal belongings had been collected, but sat in a case near the door, waiting for pickup and transfer to storage, to be returned eventually to Cavit's family. Chakotay wondered briefly what kind of man Cavit had been, but he didn't intrude on the man's last bit of privacy by rummaging through the box. It would have been a breach of faith, a kind of voyeurism he made a policy not to practice. And no matter what, he would be different from Cavit. Comparisons served no purpose. Voyager had gone in search of a Federation felon. They had found a First Officer. It would be a rough transition--for them all. He crossed to the command station, a significant structure against one wall. It was set on a low platform. He rested one booted foot against the step, reached across and touched a combination of keys, letting ingrained habit take over; like touching a piano after years of playing another instrument. "Advise status of Chakotay," he directed. "Commander Chakotay is currently assigned as First Officer, USS Voyager. Command status has been activated. Level 1 clearance. Starfleet commission reinstated. Rank--acting Commander." Janeway had done that fast, he thought. Had she been concerned he'd change his mind? He could have. He could have walked past this room, collected his crew, figured out a way to take the ship, or try to. Cause more bloodshed and loss. Continue to fight the good fight. The only problem was that these were not his enemies--especially not her, not Janeway. She just might be the best ally he ever had. "Did you ever give any real consideration to taking over Voyager?" Janeway interrupted. "Truthfully? I never considered it an option," he told her. "But you considered others?" "There were damned few to consider. Our next best choice might have been to request passage to some space port where we could find our own way home, or find some new cause to fight for. Some of my Maquis still had a lot of anger. They would have followed another cause--wanted one." "But you didn't." "I found one." "Voyager." "You, Kathryn," he corrected with calm directness. There it was. Another honest declaration, without pressure, without demands. Yet the force of it scared the hell out of her. "Chakotay..." she started to protest. Then she stopped, the words freezing in her throat, and she simply nodded. If she wasn't ready to respond with her own declaration, if she couldn't quite yet look at those feelings in the harsh light of reality, she could at least acknowledge his--offer acceptance, instead of judgment or dismissal. "Tell me more about that day," she asked, thinking: Help me to understand more about you--how you have made yourself a place on my ship, among my crew, in my life. Give me more pieces of the puzzle to sort together. Chakotay stripped off his smoke-singed clothes, rolled them up and pushed them into the recycling bin. The clothes were ruined anyway, but more importantly, he'd made the decision to commit to Voyager's Captain and he intended to fulfill the tenuous trust she'd placed in him. The clothes was dirtier than she knew, as were his hands, from his days in the Maquis. He didn't tell her much. She didn't ask much. Yet she offered him more than she knew. A chance to make his own place, to redeem himself, to redeem his faith in himself. He didn't fool himself that it would be easy--not to deal with the inevitably hostile reaction of his Maquis crew, not to gain the respect of Janeway's Starfleet crew, not to put the uniform back on. She had put him in a hell of a position. He had accepted her offer because of it. Voyager would be a proving grounds. He turned on the shower--selected real water--and stepped in. He stood there unmoving, hands pressed against the wall, head bent, the force of the wetness on his neck and back, pouring down as it washed away the stench of battle, cut through the nearly impenetrable layers of harsh reality that had coated him, allowed the veneer of civilization to reclaim him. Civility. Honor. Self-respect. He dried himself and walked nude to the replicator, ordered a uniform. The computer took a moment to transfer his pattern from the transporter to the memory banks of ship's stores. A few seconds later the folded red and black uniform materialized on the pad. A new comm badge and three single pips sat on top. There was regulation underwear as well--briefs, regulation gray. He tossed those in the recycler, ordered boxers. His preference. What was beneath his uniform was his business. He stood a moment before the mirror before dressing, as if his very body would be transformed by the uniform and he wanted one last look. Then he dressed quickly, underwear, turtleneck, socks, uniform. And he called for boots, put them on, then went back to the mirror. He was half made now--the uniform identified him as Starfleet, but he was not marked by them yet; was not linked to the computer--his heart rate, pulse not registered to his command ID in sickbay. He stuck the comm badge on his chest. There was that symbol then. He pushed the zipper down on the uniform leaving a vee of gray turtleneck exposed. It was a little less confining, even if not strictly regulation. But then he would never be a strictly regulation officer. Now he picked up the pips, rolled them in his palm, poked them with his finger. These were not new to him--he's worn Lieutenant Commander's pips comfortably, second nature, like the uniform had once become second skin. One by one he attached them to his turtleneck and then he stepped back to look. He found a familiar stranger looking back at him. The renegade was not quite gone. The tattoo marked him, the obsidian black glint in his eyes marked him, contrasting the black of the uniform, making it seem lighter somehow. Still, it was a person he seen before--just not in several years, so there were naturally some differences. And the man was different, too--more experienced, a hell of a lot wiser. Physically stronger. Salt and pepper hair. He ran a hand through the close cropped cut. Drew a breath. Released it. "And then you went to talk to your crew?" Janeway asked, shifting her legs. She has been sitting on them and her calves had stiffened up. "Let me." Chakotay set his mug on the coffee table and moved down the couch, sitting on the edge. He slipped a hand beneath her knees, forcing her legs to bend just a little. Then he slowly rubbed the tightened muscles. She reached her hand to his shoulder. He stopped--met her gaze. Her breath quickened with what she saw there. He took her hand, drew it to his mouth, touched his lips to her palm, set it back in her lap, reclaimed his mug and stood, crossing to the observation window. She followed, looked at his reflection in the viewport. Watched him collect himself. Collected herself. Only then did she touch his sleeve. "I'm sorry," he said. She found his hand. Drew it against her cheek. The smell of him touched her, the spice of his scent. This had not been her intent this night. She said so and released his hand. He stood in silence a moment, then turned to her, recovered, as much as possible. "I wouldn't mind another cup of tea." She nodded, and then a slightly wicked smile touched her mouth. "What I'd really like is chocolate--hot chocolate." She was enchanting. The quicksilver range of emotions that played across her elegant features--she was never the same woman for long--compassionate, curious, controlled, open. She could be commander, lover and co-conspirator in the space of one look. It almost took his breath away--made him dizzy. He grinned at the greed in her voice and followed her to the replicator. "Now I know what your spend your replicator rations for..." he teased as she ordered a large mug, complete with whipped cream and cherry. He settled for more of Neelix's tea. She reclaimed her seat on the couch and he sat opposite her on the floor, his back against the table. "What happened that night when you met with your crew? I'm sure it couldn't have been easy." "It wasn't. I didn't expect it to be." "Why did you choose to go and talk with them in uniform? Surely they would have been more receptive if you had broached this in civilian clothes." "Frankly, the shock value gave me an advantage. It put them off guard. I was also trying to make a point." "That your decision was made." He nodded. "And how did they receive it?" "Damned poorly." They met in Voyager's gym. It was big enough to hold their numbers, centrally located. Most of the Maquis has been quartered temporarily throughout the crew decks. Rank and assignments had yet to be determined. That, and basic preferences, would impact cabin assignments. He and Janeway would start on that yet this night--after the meeting with his crew. The crew was assembled when he arrived. He activated the door slide, stepped in, stood there a moment as the chatter died and silence took its place. He set his jaw and moved into the room, the door sliding closed. "What the hell is this?" Seska has been the first to react. She stepped up and grabbed his sleeve. He disengaged her hand. There were murmurs in the group. Ugly words. Traitor. Bastard. Coward. He didn't flinch. "I see they found your price," spat B'Elanna as she tugged at his rank pips. "I didn't think you'd go so cheap." It was dirty shot. She knew him better than that, but she was still furious he'd stopped her on the bridge, defended Janeway's authority. "You have no right to decide this for us," came a voice from the group. "You're free to spend the next 70 years in the brig," replied Chakotay calmly. "Better than the alternative. Better than selling out." "I don't intend to spend the rest of my life looking out from behind a security screen," Chakotay countered. "And I don't intend to spend the rest of my life taking orders from Starfleet," growled B'Elanna. "If I'd wanted that I could have stayed at the Academy." "You'll be taking orders from me." "Same thing." That from Seska. "Who's for taking the ship?" she shouted with intent to incite, raising her fist. Chakotay covered it with his own, forced it down. "I'm not discussing this," he warned evenly. "You think you want to try taking over the ship? Fine. You go through me. You think you want to spend the next 70 years in the brig? Fine. I'll personally escort you there and lock you up. You think you just want to leave--go someplace else? Fine. I'll carry your gear to the shuttle bay." There were a few protests, then silence. "You're a bastard," came Seska's bitter voice. "Just because you want to whore yourself to Starfleet..." "Who's the whore, Seska?" Chakotay had hit his limit of accusations, incriminations and insubordination. Her hand shot out against his face with a forceful blow. She was a strong woman. She made an impact. He did not even attempt to block her, nor did he dignify the action with acknowledgment or response. Instead he looked out over the group. "I don't think I ever did badly by you," he began. "I treated you fairly. I don't intend that to change. If you want to question my loyalties or my integrity, fine. I don't intend to justify my actions now anymore than when I ordered the ship into the Badlands. You think that was a bad decision? You think this is? Maybe I'm just a lousy commander." His eyes flicked around the room, hard, unwavering. "You think you'd rather serve under Tuvok? I'll step aside as first officer..." There were protests at that--protests against Tuvok--but still too many with anger on their faces. "Either way," he continued, "the deal's still the same. We're part of this crew now. Maybe I sold us all out. Maybe all we have are lousy choices." Lon Suder's careful voice cut through the ensuing silence from the back of the room. "Better to take orders from a Maquis traitor than a Starfleet traitor," he drawled. "And that was it?" Janeway asked softly. "For the most part." "In other words, they worked you over pretty damned hard for the next few months." "Longer. A few of them," he shrugged. "Seska was always at the back of it. Once she was gone.... "I'm sorry. I don't think I realized how difficult a position you were in." "I didn't expect you to." "And Voyager's crew?" He didn't answer, and then said, "I have a few scars." "You never reported any of it." "No." She rose, collecting his cup. "Would you mind if I changed? I've had enough hours in this uniform." "Would you prefer me to leave? We can discuss whatever you wanted tomorrow." "No. If you don't mind, I'd like to finish this." "Fine. More tea? Hot chocolate?" "Nothing. Help yourself. I'll just be a moment." He got his tea, walked about to stretch his legs while she changed. Noticed absently that the picture of Mark had been moved from her desk. Put away perhaps, or maybe she'd just put it out of public view. In its place was the largest of the shells he'd found for her on New Earth. He picked it up, remembering her expression when she'd found it on the tray at dinner. Pure delight. She gave wings to his heart. "This was a wonderful gift," Janeway said, taking the mottled shell from his hand. She'd changed into a long tunic and leggings, was barefoot, had released her hair from its confinement. It shimmered in the half-light. "I didn't know you'd brought it back." "I brought a few treasures back," she told him as she carefully set it back on the desk. "Did you get your tea?" "Yes. There's a little left..." "I'm fine. Thanks." She crossed back to the couch and he followed. "You wanted to discuss something," he said when they were seated. He was on the floor, at her feet again. Close, yet not invasive. "Yes. What would you think of doing away with the bar rank for the Maquis?" "My initial reaction? I'm opposed to it. Why do you ask?" "I think it's time we took this crew another step forward. I've actually been considering it for some time. If we're to be truly integrated, it may be time to drop the distinction." "Is it really bothering anyone?" She nodded. "A couple of the junior crew registered a complaint. They feel it represents special treatment." "What do you think?" "The rank bar sets the Maquis off as different." "We are different--as I recall, that was the intent." "As I recall, the intent was to honor your cause." "That's not gone, Kathryn. 70 light years and a Starfleet uniform don't make it vanish. I am still Maquis." She shook her head. "I disagree. We have all become more than what we were. Changed. Even if we went back now, it would not be the same. You know that saying, you can't go home again? Well, we can't--not and find the same lives we had." He was silent a moment. "I don't think I would want to. But that doesn't mean we don't remember or honor what brought us here." He grinned. "I'll bet you still have your first pip. I'll even bet we see it on your collar every day." She laughed. "An admission of guilt if I've ever heard one. Why do you wear it?" "It was the first thing I really did just for myself," she told him. "I had to fight my parents to go to the Academy." "You could put it in a drawer." "I could. But every day when I put it on, I remember why I'm here, and what brought me here. It's important. I don't want to forget." "I'm willing to bet that every officer on this ship has their first pip on their collar." She shook her head, laughing. "You should have gone into JAG. Very nice directing counselor. Should I concede now?" He took her hand and raised it to his lips. His eyes touched her own. "Kathryn, you may concede whenever you are ready." THE END PRIVATE REVERIE There are nights when I lie awake in my bed staring out at unfamiliar patterns of distant suns that, in all their multitude, shine not a fraction so bright as four silver rank pips nor so warm as a pair of deep blue eyes and I wonder does she too lie awake and make comparisons such as these? --Brenda Shaffer-Shiring VOYAGER FAN CLUBS NOW VOYAGER Official Kate Mulgrew Fan Club P.O. Box 34745 Bethesda, MD 20827-4745 tigger@cais.cais.com THE COMMANDER Official Robert Beltran Fan Club 330 Greenwich Street Reading, PA 19601-2821 B3 PRIME Official Roxann Dawson Fan Club 1630 Ft. 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